


Limitation of Counting

by Heartythrills



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Love Triangles, M/M, Minor Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Minor Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi, Off-screen Relationship(s), Slow Romance, dancing Kuroo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2018-06-02
Packaged: 2018-09-17 13:53:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9327827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heartythrills/pseuds/Heartythrills
Summary: Tsukishima counts a lot. He counts the steps he takes, the steps Yamaguchi takes, the days, the clouds, the minutes, the seconds. He counts to keep himself calm and he counts to keep busy. But after he moves out from Yamaguchi’s apartment to live with Kuroo, the longer he stays, the less he seems to count. Is Kuroo’s presence somehow limiting his counting? Or is Kuroo the limitation to his counting?





	1. Ashes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima wished the freckles on Yamaguchi’s face didn’t scatter like stars…because he knew that you could count stars, but it wasn’t physically possible to count all the stars. In the same way, he knew that he could look at Yamaguchi and stand by his side, count his steps, but he couldn’t have him to continue counting the possibilities. He wanted to grab Yamaguchi and shake him until the stars rattle and fall to his hands, fall for him to keep. How he wanted them all.
> 
> But Yamaguchi wasn’t like him. He wasn’t like Tsukishima at all. Tsukishima could ask for all the stars in the galaxy, he could defy reality and count them all, but Yamaguchi wasn’t like him. He just wasn’t like him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's here! The main ship is KuroTsuki, with focused on YamaYachi and YamaTsukki. Of course there's a bunch of other side ships that have yet to enter the screen.

In middle school, it was routine for Tsukishima to walk home with Yamaguchi who lived around the same area. Tsukishima liked keeping his headphones on even though he wasn’t listening to anything. There was a time when Yamaguchi got sick and Tsukishima went home alone. He decided to take the bus home that day. While waiting for the bus, he overheard a couple talking about how upset one of their neighbors had been when their house caught on fire. The fire truck had arrived 10 minutes after the call, but the neighbors swore it took them half an hour. The wife had said something that day that Tsukishima hadn’t remembered until today.

_When you’re in those situations, time seems to stretch. A minute turns to five, and ten minutes turn to thirty because you’re watching your things or your loved ones disappear in seconds._

Tsukishima stared at the ice cubes that fell on the floor. The frost was barely clearing. The temperature of his apartment was 75 degrees, each ice was about 1 cubic inch and probably 5 degrees since his freezer was kept at 0 degrees. This meant that it hadn’t even been 10 minutes. Yet, he felt like five hours had passed.

_Those you call come as fast as they can. But their fast is never fast enough._

For him, five hours had passed. Since the masked man came. Since he took a blow to the head—was it metal? But in all honesty, Tsukishima had suffered a lifetime since the moment Kuroo’s bleeding, bruised up cold body hovered over him. He had suffered an eternity when Kuroo…

 

**\---6 Months Earlier, Friday, June 9---**

 

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi’s voice chimed in Tsukishima’s ears. Tsukishima glanced up from his book to look at him, but avoided eye contact. He kept his eyes on the black freckles that powdered Yamaguchi’s face like sprinkling of ashes. _Ashes._ Tsukishima repeated and almost laughed to himself. Who was he kidding? Those were his feelings. Burned and sprinkled all over his childhood friend. It didn’t take much to wipe them away. He wished Yamaguchi hadn’t wiped them away. “You found a different place?”

Tsukishima fixed the sleeves of his white sweater and stood up. The knitted pattern was making his arm itch.

“Yes,” Tsukishima answered briskly as he took off his headphones. That was a lie. Tsukishima hadn’t found a place yet. He kept his eyes straight ahead without looking at Yamaguchi once. He couldn’t bring himself to.

“How much is rent?” Yamaguchi asked when they walked down the hall.

“Not that bad.” That was another lie. All the possible places he had looked at were beyond his budget. He’d be homeless if he doesn’t find one in the next few weeks.

They walked in silence for a few minutes. The sleeves of Tsukishima’s sweater were bothering him again. He used his fingers to press the itchiness as he distracted himself by counting their footsteps. He did this often. Not because Yamaguchi bored him. He did it to calm himself. For every step he took, Yamaguchi took two. It wasn’t like Yamaguchi had short legs or anything. He just took smaller strides. Tsukishima knew it was because Yamaguchi was never sure of how big or small Tsukishima’s steps would be. Yamaguchi still hadn’t realized that Tsukishima always took strides of the same length; he was always over-thinking the details. Tsukishima held back a smile. Still, Yamaguchi took smaller strides to remain right next to Tsukishima.

“Do you have a move-in date yet?” Yamaguchi stole a glance at Tsukishima and took a step too far ahead. He stumbled when he tried to adjust his stride. Tsukishima grabbed onto Yamaguchi’s arm out of habit and pulled him back in place. This happened often too. But Tsukishima had always managed to catch Yamaguchi before he tripped or fell…well, except for one time. The thought raked his heart. That was the one time that he absolutely should have caught Yamaguchi.

“Is there a reason why you don’t want to share an apartment?” There was a trace of hurt in Yamaguchi’s question. Well, of course. Tsukishima didn’t tell Yamaguchi about getting another place. Hinata did. Tsukishima knew Hinata did because he was the only one who saw him looking. Hinata was the only one he had told. Tsukishima turned his head toward Yamaguchi without really looking at him.

“No, I just wanted to live alone this year,” he answered nonchalantly and refocused his eyes up ahead. That was his third lie already.

“Don’t lie.”

Tsukishima looked down when Yamaguchi came to a stop in front of him.

“Tsukki, did I do something wrong?”

“No.” Tsukishima didn’t know if that was a lie.

Yamaguchi grabbed the collar of Tsukishima’s sweater to get his attention. “Then why aren’t you looking at me?”

Tsukishima’s jaws clenched. He hoped Yamaguchi didn’t see it. He cast his eyes down to meet Yamaguchi’s. Did you know that you can look directly at someone’s eyes and not really be looking at them? Tsukishima did exactly that.

“I’m moving out because I want to live alone for my third year.” The lies were rolling out of his mouth easily now. Though each word still cut through his heart.

“I did something wrong…” The words came out of Yamaguchi a devastated whisper as he searched Tsukishima's eyes. “Tsukki, I don’t know what it is, but I-I’m sorry,” Yamaguchi apologized.

Tsukishima wished the freckles on Yamaguchi’s face didn’t scatter like stars…because he knew that you could count stars, but it wasn’t physically possible to count all the stars. In the same way, he knew that he could look at Yamaguchi and stand by his side, count his steps, but he couldn’t have him to continue counting the possibilities. He wanted to grab Yamaguchi and shake him until the stars rattle and fall to his hands, fall for him to keep. How he wanted them all.

But Yamaguchi wasn’t like him. He wasn’t like Tsukishima at all. Tsukishima could ask for all the stars in the galaxy, he could defy reality and count them all, but Yamaguchi wasn’t like him. He just wasn’t like him.

“How was your exam?” Yachi asked when they exited the building. She was wearing a thin green cardigan and black jeans. The golden strands of her hair were always the first thing that Yamaguchi touched. The gold that weighed more…weighed much more than Tsukishima, so much more that even Yamaguchi couldn’t dare resist. All because of that fall.

Tsukishima turned his eyes away to gaze at the empty campus. It was the last day of finals after all. The sun was out now, but Tsukishima still thought the weather was a bit chilly for June.

“I don’t know. I did study though.” Yamaguchi ran his hand through his hair. His voice was void of all the hurt earlier.

 _Ashes._ The word echoed in Tsukishima’s mind, and his heart clenched.

“Tsukishima finished way earlier,” Yamaguchi sounded like he was boasting. Tsukishima stole a glance at him. He hadn’t notice that Yamaguchi was also wearing a green long sleeve and black jeans. This morning he had his grey hoodie on.

“I…forgot that I have to go meet a classmate,” Tsukishima said suddenly.

“You’re not joining us for lunch?” Yachi asked, surprised. She tucked a wisp of hair behind her ear.

“Should we wait?” Yamaguchi added as his hands locked in Yachi’s.

“No, you two go. I don’t know how long it will take,” Tsukishima responded quickly. “I’ll text you later if I’ll be back for dinner too.”

“O-ok..." Yamaguchi glanced at Yachi before turning back to Tsukishima. “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye Tsukishima-kun.” 

It wasn’t like Tsukishima never saw them together, but the frequency within the last month was increasing rapidly and so was their intimacy. Tsukishima wasn’t ready to see their intimacy. He didn’t think he’d ever be.

The two started seeing each other after Yamaguchi tripped and bumped into Yachi, who was carrying a lunch bag. Tsukishima wasn’t looking that day. No, he saw it coming, but he was mad at Yamaguchi. Tsukishima had held onto his frustration from the previous night, from that morning because Yamaguchi was pushing him far beyond his limits. That resulted in a meaningless argument so Tsukishima was walking slower than usual, while Yamaguchi was walking faster than usual. For every step Tsukishima took, Yamaguchi took five. Then, Yachi suddenly appeared. Her and her lunch bag.

At that time, Tsukishima didn’t think that the incident would grow to be so much more.

“Tsukishima,” Hinata called behind him.

“You told him, didn’t you,” Tsukishima said immediately.

“I thought he already knew…” Hinata rubbed the back of his neck and swept his lashes down. “I’m sorry.”

“Well, what’s done is done…”

Hinata wore a thin grey t-shirt and shorts. Looking at him made Tsukishima feel cold.

“So, um, about that…” Hinata started. “I have a friend who has a friend who’s renting out a room…” He handed Tsukishima a business card with a number written on the back.

“And I’m supposed to trust your judgment?”

“I’m just giving you the information,” Hinata grumbled, the frustration in him visible through the tremble of his arms as he tried not to show it.

“Well, thanks.” Tsukishima took the card.

“Now we’re even, okay?!” Hinata hollered after Tsukishima.

Even? How could this be considered even? Tsukishima hadn’t even seen the place, doesn’t even know the rent or location. But, he was tired. He didn’t feel like arguing. He didn’t feel like doing anything.

But where should he go now? It was only 1 p.m. He didn’t want to go back to the apartment until past midnight. 12 hours. He needed to waste 12 hours. Tsukishima turned his gaze upward toward the sky. It was clear. He wouldn’t be able to count the clouds. There wasn’t much to do standing in the open.

Tsukishima decided to leave campus to his car. On average, it took him 15 minutes. So if he slowed down his pace and shortened his strides a bit, it’ll take him almost 30 minutes including stoplights and yielding to cars in the parking lot. 30 minutes. That was it.

When Tsukishima got to his car, he took a drive to the park nearby. He saw a couple out for a walk. They were both men. Tsukishima smiled to himself. He wondered if that could have ever happened between him and Yamaguchi. It wasn’t like Yamaguchi had turned down any of his advances…even if those three times were when Yamaguchi was drunk.

 _Drunk._ The thought clawed his heart.

Tsukishima took off his knitted sweater. He was itching too much. He didn’t like that sweater. It was the sweater that started it all. The itching, the touching, the kiss—

His train of thought was interrupted by a smiling Sugawara outside of his car. He was knocking. Tsukishima rolled down his window.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Sugawara asked, running his hands through his silver hair before resting his elbows on the door. His cheeks were pink and he was breathless and glistening in sweat. Tsukishima thought he must’ve been running.

“Sugawara-san,” Tsukishima said. “I’m just resting after finals…” That wasn’t really a lie. He was resting and it was after finals.

“I see!” Sugawara exclaimed. “I thought something was wrong. You have goose bumps all over your arms, are you cold?”

“No…I’m fine,” Tsukishima responded and placed the sweater on the passenger seat. “Are you here alone?”

Sugawara laughed. “No, I left Oikawa at the bench. He’s resting his knees.”

So they did end up going out, Tsukishima noted. “I see.”

“Well, I don’t want to keep you,” Sugawara said and took a step back. “I’ll see you around.”

Tsukishima glanced at the time. It was 3:30 p.m. He reached in his pocket for his phone and the card Hinata had given him fell out. Stray Hearts. The business card was for a bar downtown that opened two years ago. He had never gone to Stray Hearts before, but heard about it from Sugawara and other upperclassmen. Maybe he ought to check it out. He liked the sound of the name.

Tsukishima dialed the number on the back of the card.

“Hello, this is Kuroo,” the person on the other line greeted.

“Hi, um this is Tsukishima Kei. I was given your number…” Tsukishima muttered, rubbing his thumb on the glossed side of the card in his hand. “Are you currently renting out a room?”

“Ah, yes I am,” Kuroo said. “I have a guest room I’m renting out.”

“How much is rent per month?”

“About $3000.” Tsukishima dropped the card from his hand, but before he could utter anything in reaction to the ridiculous amount, Kuroo laughed on the other line. “I’m kidding. It’s $350.”

$350? That’s insanely cheap, Tsukishima thought. Maybe it was a scam. Maybe the room was really small and crappy. Maybe there’s someone else sharing the room. An endless list of possibilities reeled in Tsukishima’s mind.

“Can I get the address to come look at the place?”

“Yeah, no problem. You ready?”

“Yeah.”

Tsukishima took down the address. It was near downtown, which was pretty close by. If the place was acceptable, the drive to school would be 15 minutes. That wasn’t bad.

“Thanks.” 

“No problem!” Kuroo chirped on the other line before hanging up.

Tsukishima remained in the car until sunset, falling in and out of sleep before he decided to head out to Stray Hearts. It was 6:30 p.m. when Tsukishima looked at the time and texted Yamaguchi that he wouldn’t be back for dinner.

Stray Hearts wasn’t exactly crowded nor was it empty. There were a total of 30 people seated—25 at the tables and 5 at the counter. Four servers and two bartenders. The place was dark, but calming. He took a seat at the counter.

“What would you like, Glasses-kun,” the bartender asked. Tsukishima looked up to see a man possibly a few years older than him. He had spiked silvery hair with black streaks and blinding gold eyes. He was wearing a black shirt with the stray heart logo on it. ‘Stray’ was written in white and cursive over the red outline of a heart.

“The most popular one.” 

“Will do, sir!” he said and turned to the other bartender. “Akaashi, you have enough for Stray One?”

“Yes, but, Bokuto-san, can you go get the ice from the back?” Akaashi asked.

“Aye-aye,” Bokuto sang, heading to the back.

Akaashi had short, unruly, black hair. His eyes were a metallic blue when he handed Tsukishima the glass.

“Thanks.” Tsukishima took the glass and downed it. A familiar taste burned his throat. Not just a taste, but a familiar sensation. He asked for two more trying to identify the familiarity. 

The music was somber when it seeped in Tsukishima's ears. It made him melancholic. He hadn’t gone out drinking for almost half a year. He didn’t really like going out drinking anymore. Drinking reminded him of Yamaguchi. Tsukishima gulped down another glass. That was the problem. He’d be reminded, and then he’d drink to forget.

His phone vibrated with a call from Yamaguchi. He grabbed it, hands shaking for a missed call. His visions were already bad. How strong were the shots? He forgot to ask. He pressed the number to call Yamaguchi back, but it wasn’t Yamaguchi’s voicemail. It was someone else's.

Tsukishima took another shot. Each gulp was a fiery sensation that burned down the words clogged in his throat to pile with the ashes of his heart. He chuckled. _Ashes_. His fists clenched when the ashes of his emotions smothered him.

Why was he still feeling? Where was the numb?

“Hey, Beautiful Eyes, where you tryna drown?”

Tsukishima followed the voice and focused his fading attention to the man who had taken the liberty of seating himself next to Tsukishima. The man was wearing a red plaid flannel with the top three buttons unfastened. He had velvet black hair with one side covering his heavily lidded eyes. When he moved, the strands would dance in the air. They looked silky and smooth; Tsukishima wondered how it would feel.

“Anywhere’s fine,” Tsukishima mumbled, “so long as I’m drowning.”

“Bad day?” The man asked, resting his elbow on the counter as he caught Tsukishima’s eyes with his honey brown eyes.

“Bad is a gentle word,” Tsukishima grumbled, reaching for another shot. It was his 6th one. Maybe just one more would be fine.

“Well, I suppose so,” the man smiled and turned to Akaashi. “I think he’s had enough for today.”

The bastard. Tsukishima placed his head down on his arms.

“Whatever the reason, drinking won’t solve anything.”

Tsukishima knew. Yes, he knew that well. Maybe too well.

But he didn’t like feeling what he was feeling. Right about now Yamaguchi was probably touching Yachi with those gentle hands, kissing her with those soft lips…  
Tsukishima bit his bottom lip remembering the sensation when he had kissed Yamaguchi the night they snuck back to their apartment after getting nearly wasted at a house party. It wasn’t just the pressing of lips. For Tsukishima it was more than that. But Yamaguchi didn’t seem to remember anything that occurred that night.

Maybe he really should’ve just told Yamaguchi. Not that that was a choice. But what was choice? Tsukishima and Yamaguchi just never stepped beyond their comfort zone when sober. Tsukishima knew Yamaguchi felt something for him, even if just a little. No matter how small, he knew they had something. So why? Why didn’t they do anything?

Tsukishima was afraid.

Of change? No. He was afraid of losing what they had. 

He feared it as though his life depended on it. What they had was irreplaceable. But, damn the butterflies, damn the heartbeats, damn it all had to change simplicity. Yet, Tsukishima wasn’t ready to lose it, neither of them were.

For as long as Yamaguchi never acknowledged Tsukishima’s glances, his touches, his words, they couldn’t be. And at the same time, for as long as Yamaguchi didn’t reject those same glances, touches, words, those affections that were plain as day, they could be.

Tsukishima consumed those two thoughts as much as they consumed him. That consumption pushed him to continue walking on the splinters of that brittle path. A path so fragile he walked on edges until he fell off.

Tsukishima dug his nails into his chest, clutching the skin that barred him from pulling that damned heart out as the numbness breached. He felt a salty sting in his eyes and his breathing faltered. He pulled out his phone to press the most recently called and heard the ringing of a phone nearby. Tsukishima turned around desperately looking for Yamaguchi.

“Tsukishima?” the man with the red plaid flannel asked, holding his phone up to show Tsukishima.

“K-Kuroo-san?” Tsukishima felt a tang of disappointment as he hung up the phone.

“Hey, you okay?” Kuroo’s voice seeped into Tsukishima’s head, but he couldn’t really respond. The man was shaking him and speaking so gently, he felt like he’d cry. “I’m going to borrow your phone to call someone to get you, okay?”

Tsukishima thought he might’ve nodded his head and unlocked his phone because he heard Yamaguchi’s voicemail.

“Tsukishima? Do you want me to drop you off?” Kuroo’s voice was dripping with concern.

But Tsukishima could no longer respond. He was drowning in his thoughts and everything else was fading out.

The path between him and Yamaguchi was never broken, fragile as it was.

Tsukishima’s body had tingled when Yamaguchi got on top of him that night. His heat overwhelmed Tsukishima when he kissed down his chest to his hips. Yamaguchi’s hair was wet from sweat as he held Tsukishima down and overtook him.

Tsukishima clawed his chest at the words he’d told himself. If the path between him and Yamaguchi came crumbling down, Tsukishima was willing to consume those splinters.

Yamaguchi had forgotten all that happened that night. Or even if he had remembered, he chose to forget. The penetration of that night paralyzed all the love that was in Tsukishima before he fell off the edge of that brittle path.

He knew he needed to consume those splinters so he could feel something, even if it meant jading his heart. Because all that was left was an abandoned path. He needed to rid it to build a new path.

_A new path._

Tsukishima woke up when he felt he couldn’t breathe. Even as his mind was a total mess, his body was trembling in a sensation he couldn’t quite translate properly. He felt something soft and warm coating his member and his hand fisted at the pleasure. But wait, what’s in his hand? He unclasped his fists when he realized that it was hair. Really, really soft and silky hair.

He opened his eyes and sat up in bed. Between his legs, yes, between his legs--that had been spread too openly, the man with the black hair had his mouth on Tsukishima’s…

“W-what are you d-doing…” Tsukishima almost exclaimed, but lost his voice when …uh…Kuroo? sucked him.

“Helping you?” Kuroo said when he pulled away from Tsukishima's member, lifting his eyes up to look at Tsukishima.

“Y-you…do you just do that to anyone?” Tsukishima stammered, aghast, clutching the sheets to maintain himself even as his heart was pounding out of control.

“No,” Kuroo wiped his mouth and brushed his fringes from his eye. “But you seem like you need it.”

“You couldn’t just use your hand?”

“Doesn’t it feel better though?”

Tsukishima was at a loss of words. The sensation was so good he thought he’d die, even if that wasn’t possible.

“So, do you want me to continue, or…?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did it. And it's going to be a more mature theme...clearly. Still in the developing stages, so I am open to suggestions. Uh...hope you enjoyed it! You can guarantee there will be a next chapter, just not a set time of release. 
> 
> I'm using Japanese alcohol age, but US college system.
> 
> Off screen ships will include BokuAka, OiSuga, KenHina, and suggested past relationship of KuroLev(?) 
> 
> Nothing's set in stone with me. If you'd like, I recently finished Black Moon, so you can check that out if you haven't already read that one.
> 
> Until then.


	2. The Day After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sorry…I don’t remember much of what happened.”
> 
> “Hmm…’s that so?” Kuroo didn’t sound like he believed Tsukishima.
> 
> “Yes…” Tsukishima responded as the whiskey gleam of Kuroo’s eyes stalled his thought process. He lifted his hand to scratch his forearm and averted his focus to the lollipop in Kuroo’s hand. “How did…I get here?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YamaTsuki and KuroTsuki moments. & lot's of dialogue.

**\-----Friday, June 10-----**

Yamaguchi has soft lips. They were terribly soft. Tsukishima felt himself melting whenever he came in contact those lips. And each time, he craved more. More of Yamaguchi’s touch, more of his kiss, more of him. For a while, short as it was, he was able to satiate those cravings. But now, he could only keep craving. Those lips would never touch his again.

Tsukishima stared blankly at the ceiling before sitting up in the unfamiliar queen size bed. The sunlight seeping through the chestnut curtains made his head hurt as he reached for his glasses on the nightstand next to the bed. His wallet and phone was on the desk across the room. The closet was empty except for three towels, and…his clothes?

Tsukishima glanced down to see that he was wearing a grey t-shirt and gym shorts. He pulled the shorts to see that his boxer briefs had been changed. He got out of bed to check his phone, but realized the battery was dead when he tried turning it on. He couldn’t tell what time it was. 

As a matter of fact, he didn’t know where he was, or how he got there. The last thing he remembered was drinking at Stray Hearts. He really did drink way too much. He couldn’t remember what happened, he was thirsty, and he had a terrible headache.

Tsukishima stepped out of the room to walk down the hallway to the living room. He could hear a soft humming and dishes clattering in the kitchen.

“Good morning, Tsukishima. Did you sleep well?”

A familiar man with black hair and a lollipop in his mouth greeted from the kitchen. He was wearing a red apron over his black t-shirt and shorts as he mixed what looked to be pancakes. His hair danced in the air when he placed the bowl aside and turned his full attention to Tsukishima. He was the man from the bar. Wait. Tsukishima racked his brain.

“Kuroo…san?”

“Yeah?” Kuroo grinned, taking the lollipop from his mouth as his eyebrows quirked in amusement. “What, did you forget me already?”

“Sorry…I don’t remember much of what happened.”

“Hmm…’s that so?” Kuroo didn’t sound like he believed Tsukishima.

“Yes…” Tsukishima responded as the whiskey gleam of Kuroo’s eyes stalled his thought process. He lifted his hand to scratch his forearm and averted his focus to the lollipop in Kuroo’s hand. “How did…I get here?”

Kuroo titled his head to the side. “You really don't remember?” 

“No....”

“What _do_ you remember?”

“I was drinking at Stray Hearts…and called Yamaguchi…” Tsukishima searched his memory for more, but couldn't piece enough to word them out. “That’s it.”

“Well…” Kuroo sighed and rubbed one of his hands on his neck as he searched for words to summarize the night before. “After your friend didn’t answer, I offered to take you home but you didn't want to go back to your place.” Kuroo paused to let Tsukishima soak in the information. “You told me to just leave you in your car, but that didn't feel right,” Kuroo shrugged. “So I just took your car and you with me.” 

A string of hazy images suddenly weaved through Tsukishima’s mind. An image of Tsukishima clinging onto Kuroo for support as they left the bar, of Kuroo fixing him into his car, of Kuroo piggybacking him into the house, of Kuroo…

Tsukishima glanced up to see Kuroo licking the lollipop before popping it back in his mouth, twirling it with his tongue.

“Well aren't you a nice shade of red,” Kuroo teased, a grin tugging at his lips as he continued to twirl the lollipop in his mouth. “Your memories coming back now?”

Tsukishima cast his eyes down, avoiding contact with Kuroo. He could feel the blood rushing up his face and he wanted to disappear. He had thought that maybe last night was just a wet dream, but seeing that Kuroo was…well, it was definitely real.

The memory of the sensation of the mouth on him last night sent a rush of heat through his body.

_Definitely real._

“I'm sorry for any inconveniences that I may have caused you...” Tsukishima mumbled awkwardly. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Kuroo laughed and grabbed a plate out from the fridge. “I made breakfast. Go wash up and come eat.”

The bathroom was next to the room Tsukishima was in. Kuroo had provided him with a towel and a toothbrush. Tsukishima looked at his reflection in the mirror. What a mess, he thought and ran his fingers through his hair. His stomach clenched and his member reacted when he remembered threading his fingers through Kuroo’s soft hair as he went down on him. _So, do you want me to continue, or not?_ Kuroo’s words echoed in Tsukishima’s head, causing goosebumps to crawl across his legs and down his arms. He couldn’t remember what his answer was. He couldn’t remember what happened after. Tsukishima jumped into the bathtub for a quick shower to calm himself down. 

“That was quick,” Kuroo commented when Tsukishima walked out.

“Um...” Tsukishima started, his eyes avoiding Kuroo’s as he looked for the words, “how far did we go last night? I don't remember anything past um...”

“The blowjob?“ Kuroo offered nonchalantly.

“Yeah...”

Tsukishima felt his face burning at the subject. How could Kuroo just talk about it so casually?

“Don’t worry, nothing happened. I stopped after you came.”

“I see…” Tsukishima responded. He felt a little disappointed in himself for allowing Kuroo, a stranger, to continue. He was embarrassed that a stranger saw him in such a state. Even Yamaguchi had always been pretty much wasted. But, Kuroo…he was probably sober.

“Don’t think too much about it,” Kuroo’s voice chimed in, seeming to have notice Tsukishima’s uneasiness. “Have some breakfast first,” Kuroo insisted as he nudged Tsukishima along to the kitchen table. “You’re probably starving. It’s already 10. You haven’t eaten since at least 8 last night.”

Tsukishima took a seat at the table to eat as Kuroo had suggested. If he were to count, he actually hadn’t eaten since 9 in the morning yesterday. He skipped lunch and dinner and went straight to the bar. It was no wonder the alcohol got to him so quickly.

“This is…” Tsukishima muttered when he took a bite of the omelet rice Kuroo made.

“Delicious?” Kuroo offered, his eyes gleaming proudly as he beamed an actual smile. He had a nice smile, Tsukishima thought.

“…Yeah…” Tsukishima agreed as he took another bite. “Or maybe I’m just hungry…”

He glanced up to see Kuroo’s face contort a bit.

“I’m kidding,” Tsukishima added quickly, watching the disappointment disappear from Kuroo’s face.

They sat in silence, Kuroo watching as Tsukishima ate the breakfast he prepared. But the silence wasn’t awkward, to Tsukishima’s surprise. It was pleasant. He hadn’t had a pleasant breakfast for a while now. Since Yamaguchi and Yachi started officially dating about two months ago.

That’s right. They started dating in April. Meals became hard because they would either be with Yachi, or if it were just Yamaguchi and him, Yachi would be the topic.

Tsukishima didn’t dislike Yachi. No, he quite liked her. He felt that there couldn’t be any better match for Yamaguchi. Except, he couldn’t support her because he wanted to be in her place. He wanted to be with Yamaguchi. But, being together was beginning to suffocate him.

That thought made his heart clench. Why did these stupid feelings have to come and complicate everything? Why did he have to have feelings for his best friend?

“Are you ok, Tsukishima?” Kuroo asked, his voice dripping in concern as he reached his hand across the table toward Tsukishima.

“I’m sorry, I…I haven’t had a good meal for a while,” Tsukishima said, dropping his spoon when he realized that he had tears streaming out of his eyes. Tsukishima shuffled his arms to wipe them away and added with a shaky voice, “I wouldn’t mind eating this everyday.”

Kuroo didn’t respond, but Tsukishima couldn’t bring himself to move his hands from his eyes. Kuroo was sharp. Tsukishima could tell that Kuroo knew that wasn’t why he was crying. If he moved his hands away, Kuroo would see through him completely.

 

But, it was too late.

 

He was in Kuroo’s arms. The warm and comforting embrace of this stranger filled his heart with sentiment and he remained there for a few minutes listening to the calm beating of Kuroo’s heart, taking in the heat of his arms around Tsukishima’s shoulders.

“Would it be okay…if I moved here?” Tsukishima asked after a while.

“It’s $350 a month,” Kuroo whispered softly into Tsukishima’s hair.

“I can afford that…for now.”

“When you can’t?”

“I’ll do all the chores.”

“Deal.”

Kuroo released Tsukishima, ruffling his hair before stepping away. He touched Tsukishima’s face, made him look up, and smiled.

“What?” Tsukishima asked, wiping his face and fixing his glasses.

Kuroo opened his mouth to say something, but shook his head gently and said, “Nothing.”

Kuroo walked to the sink to wash his hand, popped another lollipop in his mouth, and resumed to making pancakes. Tsukishima took out his phone and remembered that it was dead.

“Kuroo-san?”

“Just Kuroo’s fine.”

“Kuroo, do you have a phone charger?”

“I do. It’s at the outlet by the TV,” Kuroo informed. “That reminds me. Yamaguchi was it? Bokuto called that he went to Stray Hearts looking for you this morning.”

“Oh…I wonder how he knew I was there…” Tsukishima muttered as he charged his phone. “Did you tell him I was here?”

“Of course,” Kuroo answered matter-of-factly. “He was worried sick. He’s coming to get you at noon.”

When Tsukishima’s phone turned on, he had 57 texts from Yamaguchi, 34 from Hinata, 42 from Sugawara, all of which were asking him where he was. He also had 3 voicemails from Yamaguchi. The first one was when Tsukishima missed the call at the bar. Yamaguchi had called to tell Tsukishima that he was going out to watch a movie with Yachi, that he would be home late. The second voicemail was returning Tsukishima’s missed call after Kuroo called Yamaguchi for him. The third one… 

_Tsukki, please answer my calls. No, you don’t have to answer my calls, but just be safe, okay? I know you’re probably still mad at me…I’ll apologize to you as many times as it takes, so just come back home okay? I just wanted to say that…_

Tsukishima clutched his phone at the voicemail, breathing in shakily at Yamaguchi’s words. He didn’t mean to ignore the calls. His phone was just out of batteries. He’d never meant to cause any worries. 

“Yamaguchi?”

“Tsukki!! Are you okay? You didn’t answer my calls or texts last night; I thought something might’ve happened. I’m heading out right now…”

Tsukishima listened as Yamaguchi continued voicing his concern without interrupting. He wasn’t mad. Thank goodness, Yamaguchi wasn’t mad.

“Tsukki, you still there?”

“Yeah, I’m still here.”

When Tsukishima hung up, Kuroo leaned against the wall of the kitchen and whistled. “Nice expression you got there. Boyfriend?”

Tsukishima smiled. “I wish…”

Kuroo’s eyebrows creased and his smile faded at Tsukishima’s expressions and words.

“When can I move in?” Tsukishima asked before Kuroo could say anything.

“Whenever you’re ready…. If next week, you can pay half month’s rent.”

“I’ll have all my things in by the 14th.”

“You’re not going back home for summer?”

“I might visit, but I have summer school.”

With that, Kuroo resumed to his baking and Tsukishima returned Hinata and Sugawara’s texts as he awaited Yamaguchi’s arrival.

After half an hour of waiting, Yamaguchi arrived at Kuroo’s house. His face was swollen from crying and not having enough sleep. He immediately ran to hug Tsukishima before calming down. Yachi popped in afterwards. Something in Tsukishima’s heart rattled, but he reminded himself that he knew this was the case.

“This is Kuroo. I’ll be moving in to live with him,” Tsukishima said when Yamaguchi finally settled down.

“Nice to meet you…” Yamaguchi and Yachi greeted.

“Likewise,” Kuroo grinned. “If you miss him, you know where we are.”

Yamaguchi smiled nervously before turning to Tsukishima. "Should we head out?"

“I drove here, so I’ll come back afterwards.”

“Oh ok.”

Tsukishima sent both Yamaguchi and Yachi off before returning back inside to thank Kuroo.

“I’ll have a key ready for you when you come back. Just call me what day and time you’re moving your stuff in.”

Tsukishima returned to his apartment where Yamaguchi and Yachi prepared lunch. The next few days went by normally, except that each day the apartment became emptier and emptier as both Yamaguchi and him packed their things for their new place.

On Tsukishima’s last day, Yamaguchi went to help Yachi pack her things. Tsukishima went and sat for an hour in Yamaguchi’s room.

It was the room that witnessed it all. Their first kiss. Their second kiss. Their third kiss. All of which disappeared into the walls of the room. Nothing left. Nothing stayed. The room was empty. It was as though nothing ever happened.

It was time for Tsukishima to leave as well.

 

\----- **Wednesday, June 14** \----- 

 

“Welcome back,” Kuroo greeted and handed Tsukishima the house key.

“I’m back,” Tsukishima responded automatically.

They went over their schedules, bills, and splitting of chores. Kuroo was responsible for meals and cleaning the bathroom while Tsukishima was responsible cleaning the living room and kitchen.

“That’s that,” Kuroo said when he finished touring Tsukishima around the house. “I’m heading out to work soon and won’t be back till late so warm up to the house, okay?”

Kuroo was a nice and caring person. He seemed really good at everything he does. He was also sharp and knew how to read the atmosphere. Most of all, he liked lollipops. Today, in the two hours alone, Kuroo had about 23 lollipops, averaging about 1 lollipop every 12 minutes. 

Tsukishima spent the rest of his day unpacking before he finally took a nap on the carpeted floor of his room. When he woke up, it was already midnight. He could hear someone opening the front door and walked out to see Kuroo taking off his shoes at the entrance.

“Tsukki! I’m back,” Kuroo sang when he saw Tsukishima. He was drunk, the alcohol swirling his breath as he came to hug Tsukishima. 

“Welcome…back,” Tsukishima stammered, hearing another person call him by that nickname. 

“Let’s dance, Tsukki~” Kuroo hummed, running his hand up Tsukishima’s back as he moved to a rhythm Tsukishima couldn’t hear. He was smiling. He must’ve had a really good time.

“Kuroo, you’re drunk,” Tsukishima stated, trying to pull away from him. “Besides there’s no music…” Not that that would make any difference, Tsukishima thought. He wasn’t a dancer. He was too overly conscious and could never allow himself to dance sober. And that was the thing, he never allowed himself to get too drunk that he wasn’t in control of his conscience.

Kuroo glanced up to look at Tsukishima in surprise, his whiskey eyes glassy and unfocused. It was as though Tsukishima not hearing the music in Kuroo’s head was the strangest thing he’s ever heard. Kuroo stopped dancing to solve the mystery of it.

“Kuroo?” Tsukishima brushed his fringes from his eye before gently nudging him. “Hey Kuroo, you should go shower.”

“That’s so weird,” Kuroo mumbled to himself. “There’s music.”

Tsukishima sighed and grabbed Kuroo’s arm, wrapping his waist with one arm for support as he dragged Kuroo to the bathroom. It wasn’t the first time he'd dealt with a drunk. Yamaguchi was worst. He was clingy. And loud. And touchy. And emotional. And a mess. And that was why they got into such complicated situations. Because Yamaguchi was such a terrible drunk.

Kuroo started stripping while Tsukishima turned on the water. Tsukishima could hear the jingling of keys and belts being thrown down as Kuroo hummed. 

"Ah! I got it!" Kuroo suddenly exclaimed. "I have earbuds on."

"Hmmm...is that so?" Tsukishima responded, still testing the water. 

"Yeah," Kuroo said excitedly as he hovered over Tsukishima's back to show him the wireless earbuds. 

“Well, the…the water’s…" Tsukishima stammered when he turned around to see a naked Kuroo pressed up against him. "...um…warm…”

He blinked a couple of times, his face burning from the unexpected sight, before moving so Kuroo could go in the shower. Tsukishima closed the door behind him, slouched against the wall, and covered his face as he tried to calm the thrumming of his heart.

Kuroo’s body was so. Fucking. Hot.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally here. And I have to say I hate transition and introductory chapters.  
> Next chapter on will finally start getting more into their interactions.
> 
> And if you haven't already read it, Black Moon is complete (with on-going side chapters). Be sure to check it out.
> 
> Until then.


	3. The Birthday Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are you really a dance instructor?” Tsukishima asked as he took a sip from another drink Akaashi handed him.
> 
> “Yeah,” Kuroo nodded and caught Tsukishima’s eyes. His whiskey eyes were always so intoxicating whenever Tsukishima looked into them. “Wanna dance?”
> 
> Honestly, Tsukishima did. And maybe he would have gravitated toward Kuroo and step foot onto that living room for this activity people call dancing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's BokuAka day so I put a bit of BokuAka there at the end :D
> 
> There's OiSuga, BokuAka, KuroTsuki and whoa, wait what? KuroIwa?

\----- **Thursday, June 15-----**

“Kuroo, are you done?” Tsukishima knocked on the bathroom door after sitting around for half an hour. 

When Kuroo didn’t respond, he opened the door to find Kuroo sleeping in the bathtub. He called Kuroo’s name a couple more times before walking to the bathtub to nudge Kuroo’s shoulder, trying not to look past his chest. He was glad that his glasses fogged up in the heat when he turned off the water; the fogs kept his eyes away from where they shouldn’t be.

“You should probably get out and go to sleep,” Tsukishima said when Kuroo opened his eyes and handed him a towel.

Kuroo took the towel, grabbing onto Tsukishima’s arm for support as he got up. He wrapped the towel around his waist and walked sluggishly to his room. Tsukishima followed behind, watching him collapse into bed with just the towel. Tsukishima grabbed another towel to dry Kuroo’s hair.

“You’ll get sick if you don’t dry your hair,” Tsukishima said when he lifted Kuroo’s head to ruffle his hair with the towel. _Habits_ , he thought. He hadn’t dried Yamaguchi’s hair for a while now. Well, Yamaguchi hadn’t been going out drink and getting badly wasted like before.

“I won’t,” Kuroo mumbled and held Tsukishima’s hands in place. “You can go to sleep.”

“O-ok…” Tsukishima uttered before Kuroo released his hands. “Good night.”

Tsukishima left Kuroo’s room and went to shower before preparing to sleep. He lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, his hands clutching his phone. No texts. No missed calls. He turned to his side. But that’s nothing new, he told himself. Nothing new.

When Tsukishima woke up in the morning, Kuroo was already up and preparing breakfast.

“Good morning, Tsukishima,” Kuroo greeted. Oh, he reverted back to his full name, Tsukishima noted before responding with a good morning.

Kuroo’s hair was clipped back today, and he was wearing a red tracksuit. The lollipop remained unchanged though.

“I hope you like biscuit and eggs,” he said, pushing the lollipop to the side of his mouth. “Because that’s breakfast today.”

“That’s fine.” Tsukishima took a seat. Kuroo handed Tsukishima his plate and sat across of him.

“Sorry for last night,” Kuroo apologized, rubbing the back of his neck in guilt. “I drank a little bit too much.”

“I see…” Tsukishima responded absently, taking a bite from the biscuit. “You were fine.”

“Oh, was I?” Kuroo quirked his eyebrows, a grin tugging at his lips because he purposely took the wrong interpretation of Tsukishima’s words.

Tsukishima choked when he tried to change his words, causing Kuroo to burst out laughing uncontrollably.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” Kuroo wheezed and handed Tsukishima a glass of water. “I know what you meant.”

Tsukishima took the drink and cleared his throat. His face was red from both choking and embarrassment for taking Kuroo too seriously.

When Kuroo got the laughing out of his system, he asked, “Tsukishima, are you doing anything this Saturday?”

“No…”

“My friends are having a birthday party, wanna come with me?”

“…Not really…”

“Oh come on,” Kuroo insisted. “School’s over, might as well have fun before summer school starts.” He didn’t seem like he would be taking ‘no’ for an answer.

Tsukishima sighed and got up to do the dishes. Kuroo nudged him.

“So that’s a yes?”

Tsukishima chuckled, nodding his head. God damn this guy.

“Yes.”

\----- **Saturday, June 17** \-----

The party was over at Bokuto and Akaashi’s house. They lived 2 blocks away from Kuroo’s house, about a 5-minute drive. It was 9:10 p.m. when Kuroo pulled up to the driveway. When they got out of the car, the first person to greet them was Oikawa’s childhood friend, Iwaizumi Hajime. Tsukishima had met him a few times the previous year whenever he encountered Oikawa near school. Iwaizumi was wearing a thin hoodie over a light-green polo and jeans. His onyx black hair was spiked like how Tsukishima was used to seeing him.

“Happy late birthday, man,” Kuroo said, shaking his hand before pulling him in for a hug. “Where’s your shitty friend?”

Iwaizumi laughed. “Beats me. Probably picking up his boyfriend.”

When they entered the house, Tsukishima could spot a few recognizable faces. Most of the seniors he knew from school were here. Tsukishima followed Kuroo to the kitchen, noticing Bokuto and Akaashi mixing drinks in the kitchen. Kuroo took a seat at the bar counter, dragging Tsukishima to sit next to him.

"Tsukki, right?" Bokuto asked. 

"It's Tsukishima," Tsukishima corrected.

"Is your friend coming by today too?"

“No, he’s busy with something else,” Tsukishima said.

Yamaguchi was on a date with Yachi. She was going home for the week, so they were spending the weekend together.

“Here,” Akaashi handed Tsukishima a bottle of beer. “Loosen up a bit.”

“Thanks.”

Tsukishima took the bottle, but he wasn’t intending on drinking much of it. He glanced around. The house had two floors. The living room was directly across from the kitchen, the side of the TV and couch visible from the counter. It was set the same way as Kuroo’s house. Everyone was crowding into the living room.

“Ah, Tsukishima?” a familiar voice exclaimed from behind.

Tsukishima turned to see Hinata standing next to a man with blonde hair and black roots. He was playing a game on his phone.

“What are you doing here?” Hinata asked.

“Celebrating the brief end of school,” Tsukishima responded sarcastically.

“Kenma, is that the friend with the friend?” Kuroo asked, getting the blonde to glance up quickly and nod before returning his attention to the game.

“I moved in with him,” Tsukishima said, pointing to Kuroo. It was Hinata who gave him the contact information, so he should at least tell him that much.

“Shouyo, I’m heading to the garage,” Kenma said before Hinata had time to respond to Tsukishima.

When Kenma and Hinata left, Kuroo stood up. “Come on, Tsukishima, let’s go grab some food.”

As Tsukishima and Kuroo were heading into the garage, Kiyoko came out from it. She was wearing cardigan over her blue blouse and white shorts.

“Good evening Gorgeous,” Kuroo greeted when Kiyoko walked in, leaning in to corner her against the wall, “Shall I take your clothes,” he coughed, “I mean cardigan off for you?”

“That won’t be necessary,” Kiyoko replied, ducking under Kuroo’s arms effortlessly to leave. When Kuroo reached out his hand toward Kiyoko, another hand grabbed his.

“Kuroo, I thought you swung the other way,” Daichi interrupted as he strangled Kuroo’s forearm.

“I'll swing either way for Kiyoko-chan.” Kuroo forced a grin, trying to wrestle free from Daichi’s death grip.

“I didn't realize you were so well-rounded,” Daichi commented sardonically.

"God, you two are already at it?" Sugawara's voice chimed in when he opened the garage door. "The party hasn't even started."

“Was someone neglected?” Kuroo bit back and stepped away from Daichi.

“Neglected?” Oikawa repeated, appearing behind Sugawara and swooped him into his arms to kiss him. “How so?”

Kuroo rolled his eyes when Sugawara grinned and quirked his eyebrow as though to say, _yeah, how so?_ before returning Oikawa’s kiss. "Get a room."

“We will, soon enough,” Oikawa said, breaking the kiss. “How've you been, Tsukishima?”

Tsukishima greeted him and Sugawara.

“So you guys know each other?” Kuroo asked, eating chips from Oikawa’s plate.

“Yeah, we went to the same school,” Sugawara explained. He turned to fix Tsukishima’s collar. “Why are you hanging around this man, Tsukishima? He’s shady as hell,” Sugawara joked.

“He’s my only option. Rental prices were cheap,” Tsukishima said.

Sugawara and Oikawa gasped exaggeratedly and eyed Kuroo suspiciously. “How cheap?”

“Just two times a night,” Kuroo played along.

“You said that you wouldn’t tell,” Tsukishima hissed, stunning Kuroo, Sugawara, and Oikawa. “I’m kidding…” Tsukishima said when the three didn’t respond. His cheeks burned and he fidgeted with the hem of his long sleeve at the prolonged silence until he finally got a sigh of relief out of Sugawara.

“I’m watching you, Kuroo,” Sugawara said before leaving.

“Tsukishima,” Kuroo started, but only got as far as to getting Tsukishima’s attention with his name before Oikawa stopped the music.

“Now for the birthday boys’ lap dances,” Oikawa announced and the background music changed.

Tsukishima returned to the bar counter, focusing his attention into the living room, watching as Oikawa pulled Sugawara from the crowd and seated him on the couch.

Sugawara fanned himself and whistled when Oikawa walked over to him and turned his back to him. Everyone gathered into the room, watching Oikawa dance in front of Sugawara, rocking his hips as he placed his hands on Sugawara’s knees, parted his partner’s legs to grind down lightly on Sugawara's lap. When Sugawara extended his hands to hold Oikawa’s waist, Oikawa grabbed his hand and turned around to straddle Sugawara on the couch. He pinned Sugawara’s hands on the couch and rolled his body in one fluid motion, emphasizing on his hips to tease Sugawara. He grazed his lips against Sugawara's cheeks, but never fully gave him the contact he needed. When Sugawara couldn’t take it anymore, he started kicking the air and calling Oikawa’s name in defeat as he tried to cover his face in embarrassment.

“Get a room!” Kuroo hollered before making his way to Tsukishima. "You looked profoundly interested,” Kuroo observed. “Never had a lap dance?"

"Why does that matter?" Tsukishima dodged the question.

Kuroo's eyes lit up and he grinned, "Wanna get one?"

"I'd much rather not," Tsukishima faked a smile before taking a sip from his bottle. It wouldn't be good for his heart to get a lap dance. Hell, his heart was already faltering with the thought of Yamaguchi rolling his body against him.

“Where’s the other birthday boy?” Someone from the crowd asked.

Oikawa and Sugawara dragged Iwaizumi from the crowd and pushed him onto the couch.

“Who’s dancing?” Oikawa asked.

“Kiyoko-chan is!” Kuroo volunteered when Kiyoko passed by.

Everyone grew silent for a second as Kiyoko walked to the couch, tucking her hair behind her ears before leaning over Iwaizumi’s shoulder. Tsukishima could see Daichi’s face growing grim with the seconds ticking by.

“Happy be-lated birthday, Iwaizumi-san,” Kiyoko said and stepped back into the crowd.

For a second, Tsukishima thought everyone exhaled a sigh of relief.

“Guess you get the dance instructor instead,” Kuroo announced, taking off his grey flannel to reveal his skin tight, black shirt as he walked over to Iwaizumi. Tsukishima’s eyes followed the rippling of Kuroo’s muscle as he moved, taking in all that he couldn’t take in the other day.

Everyone hooted and whistled when Kuroo ran his hand through his hair as he rocked his hips in slow, deliberate motions with the beat captivatingly. Tsukishima's eyes followed Kuroo's hand as it pushed down his chest to the flat of his stomach. A slight dip, a quick thrust, and Kuroo's hand was between his parted legs. Tsukishima stopped breathing for a second, feeling a questionable heat in his stomach. He gulped down his drink watching Kuroo lean over to push Iwaizumi's knees apart, all the while enticing the whole crowd with the motion of his hips. Tsukishima couldn't keep his eyes off the curve of Kuroo's back as he squat in front of Iwaizumi, holding his breath as Kuroo drew circles on Iwaizumi's knees, eventually moving up his thighs. Iwaizumi turned his head to the side and laughed, muttering something to Kuroo as he gently smacked his head.

But Kuroo didn’t stop. Instead, he smoothed his hands back down Iwaizumi’s thighs to spread his legs further apart. Kuroo glanced up, winked, and pushed himself up in the space between Iwaizumi’s legs, rolling his body as he leaned forward to brush against Iwaizumi. Tsukishima could feel his stomaching knotting in response, a ghost of Kuroo's breath against his neck. He hadn't realize dancing could have so much effect on him. He watched Iwaizumi’s smile tipped out of balance, and he threw his head back in response, biting back that grin on his face as his body arched and his hands gripped the couch instinctively before he covered his face in embarrassment.

Everyone started hollering and whistling when Kuroo grinned and hopped onto Iwaizumi’s lap for a selfie.

“You fucker.” Iwaizumi smacked Kuroo’s head again when he finally calmed down.

Kuroo laughed as he got off of Iwaizumi to pick his flannel off the floor and step back into the crowd, high-fiving with a few guys and getting punched in the back by Daichi for offering up Kiyoko.

“Damn, that was hot,” Bokuto commented behind the counter.

Tsukishima took another gulp from his bottle. He thought so too. He had never really paid attention to people dancing. Never cared. But that, what Oikawa and Kuroo just did, that completely grasped his attention.

“Well, that’s a dance instructor for you,” Akaashi said. “His movements are on point.”

“Tell me about it,” Bokuto muttered. “Even I would hesitate between you and him.”

Tsukishima didn’t see it, but he figured Akaashi just elbowed Bokuto.

“I’m kidding,” Bokuto said apologetically.

Kuroo’s movements were very sensual. Tsukishima’s stomach clenched when he remembered how Kuroo’s body looked naked. He wondered how Kuroo’s movements would be like in bed…wait, what the hell was he just thinking about? Tsukishima emptied his bottle to chase away his thoughts.

“Yo!” Kuroo greeted when he came and sat next to Tsukishima.

“Welcome back,” Tsukishima muttered, avoiding eye contact with him as he turned around to place the empty bottle back on the counter.

“Bro, that was brilliant!” Bokuto complimented, lifting his hand for a high-five.

Akaashi nodded solemnly as he handed Kuroo a drink.

“Bourbon, neat.”

“Even when you’re not working, you’re working, Akaashi,” Kuroo chuckled. “Make something light for this one, too.” Kuroo said, thumbing at Tsukishima. “He’s finally finished nursing his drink.”

Akaashi handed Tsukishima a shot, in which Tsukishima took right away since everyone was being attentive to him.

“That’s more like it,” Kuroo smiled and rested his head on his hand. “A few more, and I think we can dance.”

“Are you really a dance instructor?” Tsukishima asked as he took a sip from another drink Akaashi handed him.

“Yeah,” Kuroo nodded and caught Tsukishima’s eyes. His whiskey eyes were always so intoxicating whenever Tsukishima looked into them. “Wanna dance?”

Honestly, Tsukishima did. And maybe he would have gravitated toward Kuroo and stepped foot onto that living room for this activity people call dancing.

_But._

_But then._

But then he hesitated. He hesitated a second too long. He was still too conscious of his surroundings.

The intoxication vanished as the crowd started calling Kuroo’s name for another lap dance. A pro lap dance for the next birthday boy, Hinata, but Kuroo declined.

“That’s the one person I absolutely can’t.”

With that, Bokuto went over and gave him a lap dance, following up with Akaashi.

“I’m stepping out for a bit,” Tsukishima told Kuroo and left the house for fresh air outside.

His phone vibrated with a text from Yamaguchi asking how the party was going. It was a bit past midnight. Yamaguchi must have gotten home. Tsukishima responded with a brief reply, “It’s ok.”

When Tsukishima walked back into the house, everyone was playing a drinking game. Daichi and Kiyoko were at the counter instead of Bokuto and Akaashi. Tsukishima tried to locate Kuroo, but couldn’t so he went upstairs. The lights upstairs were off and the first two rooms were closed. When he got to the last room, he heard voices. The door wasn’t closed tightly so he peeked through to see if Kuroo was there.

"Akaashi, can we?" Bokuto’s voice was breathy as he hugged Akaashi from behind, pulling at the hem of his shirt and kissing down his neck.

"No,” Akaashi whispered, holding Bokuto’s hands when they found their way under his shirt. “Wait till later."

"But Akaaashii…" Bokuto nipped at Akaashi’s neck. "I can't wait…"

Akaashi closed his eyes and uttered a sigh as he raised his hand over his head to run his fingers through Bokuto’s hair when the other gripped his thighs and started moving his hips. He turned his head to kiss Bokuto and murmured, "Not here. I just cleaned the sheets this morning."

“Where?” Bokuto turned Akaashi completely around and lifted him up, squeezing his thigh as they wrapped around him.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi hummed as he kissed him and fisted his hands into Bokuto’s hair.

“What’s my name?” Bokuto asked between parted lips, walking toward another door in the room.

“Bokuto,” Akaashi breathed as he pulled his shirt off.

“My first name.”

When Akaashi didn’t respond, Bokuto pushed him up against the door and stopped moving his hips. The other continued to kiss him, searing kisses down his neck and nipping his lips, surging his hips forward restlessly for the contact he desperately needed. Bokuto smiled when Akaashi’s legs tightened around him, his head tipped back and his arms raised up against the doorframe for support as he sought for more friction.

“Koutarou!” Akaashi gasped when Bokuto suddenly thrust his hips, picking up the speed as Akaashi repeated his name. Akaashi leaned forward to bite Bokuto’s neck when Bokuto finally opened the door to what seemed to be the bathroom. Tsukishima could hear some things falling as Bokuto placed Akaashi onto the counter and closed the door.

“That’s some hot stuff, ain’t it,” a familiar voice breathed down Tsukishima’s neck.

Tsukishima hit his head against the door in surprise, lost his balance and fell over, Kuroo tumbling down with him.

“The hell. You scared me,” Tsukishima whispered, holding his chest to contain his cool as he tried to pull out from the body on top of his.

“I didn’t think you were the type to eavesdrop,” Kuroo grinned as he pushed himself off of Tsukishima and leaned back to rest on his hands.

“I’m not…” Tsukishima wrapped his arms around his knees and turned his head to the side.

“What were you doing here then?” 

“Looking for you…” Tsukishima admitted.

Kuroo’s quirked his eyebrow. “Oho?”

“When are we leaving?” Tsukishima asked, standing up. Kuroo lifted his hands to Tsukishima and he pulled him up, the other tipping forward as he tried to balance himself.

“What time is it?” Kuroo whispered, leaning closely to Tsukishima.

“1:24 a.m.”

“It’s still early.” 

“You’re drunk,” Tsukishima observed, feeling Kuroo’s fingers on his.

“You’re right,” Kuroo chuckled and stepped away from Tsukishima. “I’m drunk.”

“I’ll drive back.”

“Yeah.”

Tsukishima helped Kuroo down stairs, picking up their things before having Kuroo wait at the side of the living room door while he went to look for Oikawa or Sugawara to tell them that they were leaving.

“Oh, Suga?” Daichi confirmed. “They went upstairs a while back…”

“I see…” Tsukishima muttered. “Well, tell them Kuroo and I went back home.”

Daichi nodded and Tsukishima returned to get Kuroo. He found Kuroo nodding off and nudged him.

“Everyone was occupied so Daichi will pass on the message,” Tsukishima explained to Kuroo.

As Tsukishima turned to leave, he bumped into someone and took in the spill of their drink. The familiar wetness on his stomach made his body shudder. The smell paralyzed him when he identified the all too familiar drink.

“I’m sorry,” the familiar voice, no, Yamaguchi’s voice rung in his ears.

Something in Tsukishima’s heart stilled. It wasn’t something. Tsukishima’s heart and body stilled. This was one of the splinters in his heart. This scene was all too familiar. This had happened before. This was how it all started. 

“Yamaguchi?”

Yamaguchi lifted his head up, his eyes the same pool of glassy wonder. He was drunk. “Tsukki! Surprise!”

_Surprise. Yes. Absolutely._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 chapters in a week, I'm on fire. Just kidding. Both of my work schedule happened to work out well and I've been have KuroTsuki feels so yeah...
> 
> Would you believe me if I said that this whole story was thought up because of the Kuroo Wiggle Dance vid? Well, believe it because that was absolutely the case. Kuroo's a dance instructor. Yeah, I had to do so much research for dancing terms.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed their lap dances. :D can't wait for the KuroTsuki lap dance *wink wink*
> 
> Until then.


	4. Hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Why’d you bring that?” Tsukishima asked before catching Yamaguchi’s eyes. Each glimmer in his pupils plucked the strings in Tsukishima’s heart, and each pluck pulled Tsukishima to Yamaguchi as he reached for the drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mainly a yamatsuki flashback chapter and a sprinkle of kurotsuki at the end.

Tsukishima took another shot of vodka offered to him before stepping out to the front yard. The cool breeze made Tsukishima shiver, and he pulled the sleeves of his white knitted sweater down.

“Tsukki!” Yamaguchi called behind him.

Even though Yamaguchi was his childhood friend, and he’d heard this voice over and over again throughout the years, Tsukishima was never tired of hearing it. Rather, he wanted to hear more of it. Yamaguchi’s voice pulled strings in Tsukishima’s heart that he didn’t know existed; each strum left wakes of goosebumps across his skin.

“What?”

Yamaguchi didn’t say anything. He simply clung onto Tsukishima’s arm and smiled. The ginger glaze of his eyes made it clear that Yamaguchi was wasted. Fortunately, Sugawara was dropping them off at their apartment.

Still, it took all the chains in his heart and every ounce of rationality left in Tsukishima to not grab Yamaguchi and press that body up against him in that five-minute ride. His body stiffened each time Yamaguchi’s fingers tugged at his shirt, his breathing faltered each time those fingers made it beneath the hem, the small contact burning his flesh as they sat in Sugawara’s backseat.

“Thanks for driving us back,” Tsukishima said to Sugawara as he helped Yamaguchi out of the car and closed the door. The freckled drunk clung to him as they made their way to their apartment.

It was 2:34 a.m. when Tsukishima finally dragged them both into Yamaguchi’s room, setting the nearly passed out friend down on the bed to grab a bottle of water and catch his breath. Nights like this was becoming harder and harder as his buried emotions demanded to be felt.

Upon return, he was surprised to see that Yamaguchi was sitting up, fumbling in his bag for something.

“Taste this drink,” Yamaguchi slurred, his eyes a glassy gleam as he got up, stumbling his way to offer a bottle to Tsukishima. “It’s called White Russian.” Yamaguchi stopped to hold the edge of the bed for balance and took off the cap. Tsukishima glanced at the drink, realizing that Yamaguchi have filled an empty water bottle with the mix.

“Why’d you bring that?” Tsukishima asked before catching Yamaguchi’s eyes. Each glimmer in his pupils plucked the strings in Tsukishima’s heart, and each pluck pulled Tsukishima to Yamaguchi as he reached for the drink.

Yamaguchi smiled absently, edging toward Tsukishima. But before he could hand Tsukishima the drink, Yamaguchi slipped and spilled the drink all over Tsukishima.

Everything became a white blur. The next thing Tsukishima knew, he was on the floor and Yamaguchi was kneeling between his legs, muttering apologies as he desperately tried to dry Tsukishima’s clothes with his own.

“It’s okay, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima coaxed, trying to stop Yamaguchi. But the freckled friend didn’t look up. He continued pressing his hands on Tsukishima’s stomach down to the front rise of his jeans. Tsukishima’s heart stuttered, the strings pulling too tight he felt they might snap. “Stop it, Yamaguchi.” He grabbed Yamaguchi’s hands. “I got it.”

A part of Tsukishima wanted to push Yamaguchi off of him, and a part of him wanted to pull Yamaguchi to him, pressing their bodies so close he’d feel every dip and curve of his body, every rise and fall of his chest, every single beat of his heart. But seeing Yamaguchi’s face so filled with guilt, he just sat there in silence, feeling the alcohol stick to his skin.

“Sorry, Tsukki…” Yamaguchi repeated when Tsukishima released his hands to scratch his forearm, resisting the urge to relieve the itch on his stomach.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine.”

“You should take off that sweater.” Yamaguchi extended his hands toward Tsukishima, grazing his fingers on the wet parts of Tsukishima’s sweater. “You’re probably itching right?” Yamaguchi lifted his eyes to peer at Tsukishima. His caramel pupils gleamed an apology through the intoxicated gloss and red. Tsukishima gulped as the strings in his heart tangled.

“No, I’m fine. I’ll shower soon anyways.”

Yamaguchi moved his hand to where Tsukishima was scratching on his forearm.

“You’re not fine.”

Tsukishima wasn’t fine. His heart was rattling out of control and he let those caramel eyes glaze over his reason, let the touch drug him into a raging stupor.

“I’m not…” Tsukishima muttered before he leaned and pressed his lips against Yamaguchi’s.

“No, you’re not…”

Yamaguchi had terribly soft lips. Tsukishima thought he’d melt when those lips touched his again.

And again.

 

\----- **Sunday, June 18-----**

 

“You okay, Tsukishima?”

Tsukishima opened his eyes to see Kuroo lying next to him, his face swamped with concern. Tsukishima was in bed and wearing Kuroo’s grey flannel. The room didn’t look familiar.

“Where are we?” Tsukishima asked as he sat up to look for his glasses and phone. It was 3:05 a.m. He had been out for about an hour and a half. He looked around the nearly empty room. There was a drawer and a chair where his pants and sweater hung. The walls were empty, almost as though no one slept in that room. The window curtains were closed, but the moonlight still shone through the gap.

“One of Bokuto’s empty rooms,” Kuroo responded, his eyes reluctantly closing and his lashes kissed his cheeks.

“Where’s Yamaguchi?”

“Sleeping downstairs.”

What happened? Tsukishima wanted to ask, but Kuroo was already breathing soundly. He looked down at man, brushing his silky black hair out of his face. Kuroo was more handsome than Tsukishima had realized. He leaned closer to study Kuroo’s features before knitting his eyebrows together bitterly. Kuroo’s body was undeniably attractive; he was a fantastic cook, and apparently an acknowledged dancer. What the hell couldn’t Kuroo do? He even gave earth-shattering blowjobs. The thought made Tsukishima’s heart fidget and he absently ran the pad of his thumb over the swell of Kuroo’s bottom lip. Nice, Tsukishima thought as he pressed down on it, pulling Kuroo’s lips apart.

“What?” Kuroo slurred, opening one eye lazily.

“Nothing,” Tsukishima whispered without moving his thumb when Kuroo’s lips pursed against it.

“Go to sleep.”

“I can’t.”

“Just try…” Kuroo insisted, moving Tsukishima’s hand from his mouth to the pillow.

Tsukishima sighed. “I’m going to get fresh air outside.”

But before Tsukishima had the chance to move, Kuroo took his hand and, in one smooth motion, pulled Tsukishima on top of him, crushing Tsukishima’s head to his chest. The pounding of Kuroo’s heart slightly out of rhythm. Too many beats per second.

“How the hell am I supposed to sleep like this?” Tsukishima grumbled into Kuroo, feeling the pounding of his own heart when he remembered how Kuroo’s body moved against Iwaizumi.

“You don’t,” Kuroo chuckled weakly, adjusting himself more comfortably beneath the blonde, and causing the latter’s body to stiffen at pressure of each motion.

“Can we go back to the house?” Tsukishima asked, trying to escaping Kuroo’s grasp on him for several reasons, including calming his heart down, relieving his mind of various memories of Kuroo, and breathing. He needed to breathe.

“I’m exhausted,” Kuroo mumbled without releasing Tsukishima. “Give me an hour.”

Tsukishima offered driving but Kuroo refused and insisted he nap until 5:00 a.m. Tsukishima’s body had relaxed by the time Kuroo fell asleep, their heart beats syncing in a calm rhythm before he rolled off of him onto the mattress and stared blankly at the ceiling. It was only 3:24 a.m.

It’s been a while since he dreamt about that first night with Yamaguchi. Tsukishima covered his eyes with his arms. He hated when his memories weaved those dreams. Dreams like bullets that’ll break those heavy chains and tear through to his heart. Those dreams made him vulnerable. Made him irrational. Made him want Yamaguchi…who was in reach, who was sleeping, who was unguarded.

Tsukishima sat up in bed, his stomach knotted and heart burning. He wanted to go to Yamaguchi. He wanted to go look at that sleeping face he hadn’t been able to see lately. He wanted—

“…ev…” Kuroo mumbled in his sleep as he turned over.

Tsukishima clutched his chest and almost laughed to himself. What was he thinking? Yamaguchi’s _taken_. Maybe the alcohol hadn’t worn off. Tsukishima got out of bed to put on his pants that were still damp from the alcohol. He needed air. He needed fresh air.

Tsukishima didn't make it very far out the room before Kuroo pulled him back in and closed the door. But even with Kuroo’s preemptive move, it wasn’t hard to identify the familiar gold in Yamaguchi’s arms.

“I know you mean well…” Tsukishima said, his eyes absently tracing Kuroo’s arms that barred him against the door. “But it’s a reality I’ll have to accept.”

“You can accept it, but if it’s gonna hurt seeing, you don’t have to,” Kuroo whispered.

“If I don’t,” Tsukishima’s lips quivered as he spoke without lifting his eyes up to meet the other’s. “I’ll keep on hurting.”

“Sometimes hurting just hurts,” Kuroo said as one hand came down to caress Tsukishima’s cheek. “It doesn’t make you stronger. It doesn’t numb you. It doesn’t do anything.”

It doesn’t do anything, but hurt. Hurt for seeing, hurt for not seeing. Hurt for feeling, hurt for not feeling. Hurt when he’s alone. Hurt when they’re together. He would hurt no matter what.

“Kuroo, I…want to see him.” There was a trace of hurt in Kuroo’s eyes when Tsukishima finally looked into them as he moved the hand from his cheek, and Tsukishima felt a thread of guilt strangle his heart, but the words came out again. “I want to see him, Kuroo.”

Kuroo didn’t say anything as he wiped the tear drop that clung at the edge of Tsukishima’s eye. His touch was gentle and it spoke compassion. A gentle squeeze on the shoulder and Kuroo stepped back.

Tsukishima reached for the knob of the door, hands trembling in hesitation when hurt lashed at him through images his mind hid deep in his sleep. Images of Yamaguchi and him. Images of Yamaguchi and Yachi. Images of his hair growing long and gold as the strands tangled in Yamaguchi’s hands. Tsukishima’s hands fell to his side with the door knob untouched and felt his insides wilt. Those weren’t his hair. The golden strands that tangled Yamaguchi’s hand weren’t his. The skin that shivered, the breath that lingered, the names that echoed, and the bodies that melded, those were all no longer his. Those were never his.

This time, it wasn’t just his tears that escaped him. The strangled emotions that he caged deep in his heart now clung defiantly at his throat and spewed out of his mouth in damaged sounds, words muddled like a forgotten language oozing out of coughs and chokes and gasps to smear against the floor that he now realized was hard, cold and unforgiving.

Still, the hand he had pushed away came back to hold him, to pick his heart from the floor, and string that pile of broken utterance and expression into words that made his heart cry out.

“You love him, don’t you?”

The words are so ugly, so rusty, so worthless and pathetic as they came out endlessly, repeatedly, spitefully. _I do. I love him. In so many ways. I’m in love with my childhood friend._

Kuroo’s fingertips felt like peace against Tsukishima’s cheeks when he lifted his face up. His eyes were untarnished gold that glimmered worth into Tsukishima as his gaze spoke galaxies.

“So what if you do,” Kuroo said finally, and Tsukishima could have sworn Kuroo wore love on his lips when he smiled. “Don’t hurt yourself unnecessarily over it.”

Tsukishima found his hands in Kuroo’s, borrowing the strength from the latter to pick himself off the floor that now bore his emotions.

“Let’s go home,” Kuroo whispered when their eyes met again, and for a split second, the thought of dancing with Kuroo trickled through his mind to marinate in the unlit parts of his heart.

There were no hesitation in Tsukishima’s nod and instantly, they were out the door. Tsukishima had three seconds. Just three seconds to glance at Yamaguchi through his smeared glasses before Kuroo’s hand covered his eyes. All that was left was his rendition of Yamaguchi in the comforting darkness Kuroo lent him. Tsukishima hoped Yamaguchi was happy with all the gold he could never be. He hoped Yamaguchi and Yachi would be happy in ways the universe couldn’t even imagine possible.

Kuroo lifted his hand and Tsukishima’s eyes adjusted to see the stars in the dark of night before following Kuroo’s dancing black strands back to the stunning glow of his face under the radiance of the moon’s last quarter. Tsukishima hoped that this man too would find an irreplaceable happiness. If possible tonight, he’d like to pave a road toward that happiness starting with the worth Kuroo made Tsukishima feel.

“Got your fresh air?” Kuroo asked, resting his elbow on the roof of the car and fixing his hair a bit before looking at Tsukishima.

Maybe Tsukishima’s eyes rolled because Kuroo laughed. He laughed so enchantingly beautiful into the night, Tsukishima thought and a smile meandered across his face. He wished he would be able to laugh like that too.

“If you need someone to talk to,” Kuroo said, the curve of his grin under the moonlight hooking to uncharted parts of Tsukishima’s heart. “You can always come to me.” He winked playfully and added, “You can’t find anyone better than me.”

Tsukishima laughed. Oh, he really laughed because was Kuroo trying to comfort him or brag about himself? He laughed until the other joined in laughing as well. Maybe that was the point of it all. He needed to laugh, he needed a starting point for happy. His heart warmed at the thought. There are only a few words in this world that still weighed like gold in Tsukishima’s mouth, and he felt he’d spend it all for this guy.

“Thank you, Kuroo.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're not completely over with YamaTsuki yet, but it'll be a few chapters before we get back to that. Next chapter will focus more on KuroTsuki.


	5. like it's not even real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima swallowed thickly as his eyes followed the sweat trail from Kuroo’s forehead down his temple, his cheeks, his angular jaws because damn...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hearty record - this chapter is actually 5k words. Bunch of KuroTsuki fluff yay :D

\----- **Sunday, June 18-----**

 

Kuroo was already up and in the kitchen by 7:30 a.m. Tsukishima wondered if he ever really sleeps, especially since they didn’t get home until 4:00 a.m. Kuroo didn’t even hit the showers until after him either.

Tsukishima rolled on his stomach in bed and stared at the unfinished sentence on his phone. His head hurt, but he really should text Yamaguchi for leaving without properly greeting him. Yamaguchi wouldn’t hold it against him, but he himself would feel like he’d done something wrong. Tsukishima sighed, rolling on his back to reread what he had typed 10 minutes ago. _Sorry I left early._

It was short, but it was something. His thumb stalled over the send button. It should be fine. If he wrote more, he’d start thinking about last night. Tsukishima took a deep breath and the aroma of a sweet breakfast from the kitchen chased the thoughts away. He pressed the button, placed his phone down, and left the room.

“You’re in a good mood,” Tsukishima observed as soon as he stepped into the kitchen. Kuroo’s bangs were tied up, and he had a lollipop in his mouth as he danced around while cooking.

Kuroo didn’t hide the enthusiasm. He beamed a smile that shone all too brightly when he turned to Tsukishima. “I am.”

“What’s going on?” Tsukishima asked and settled himself at the table, the words broadening Kuroo’s smile.

“I’d been asked to choreograph a couple dance for one of my clients,” Kuroo gushed, his eyes lighting up from brown to gold. Tsukishima felt something tug in his heart and he blinked. That was cute.

“That…that’s nice…” _Really?_ Couldn’t he have said something better? He wasn’t particularly short on vocabs here.

“I know!” The lollipop nearly fell out of Kuroo’s mouth when he exclaimed, unaffected by Tsukishima’s lack of words because the blonde’s face showed every ounce of care. Maybe he just wasn’t good at expressing himself, because he sure as hell cared. “I couldn’t sleep because I kept thinking about the routine.”

Dancing wasn’t something Tsukishima cared about. He couldn’t tell the difference between good dancing and bad dancing. In all honesty, he knew close to nothing about it. But, the look on Kuroo’s face wasn’t anything new. Tsukishima saw it often on Yamaguchi’s face growing up. He caught Kuroo’s eyes and encouraged with a smile. “I’d like to see. Can you show me the dance routine?”

“Really?” Kuroo asked too excitedly, before realizing it and held himself back. “It’s still in the developing stages though.” His lashes swept down as he massaged his neck. His cheeks slightly reddened, suddenly bashful, and he twirled the lollipop in his mouth. Tsukishima felt a second tug in his heart. He didn’t think Kuroo had a bashful side.

“That’s fine.” When Tsukishima said those words, he didn’t realize he signed up for something else.

“It’s ok; you don’t need to do anything,” Kuroo promised when he had to put more strength in pulling Tsukishima off the dining chair to the living room, the latter not believing a single word. “I just need you to stand there.”

“I _really_ don’t dance. Kuroo, _no,_ ” Tsukishima protested, but _damn_ , had Kuroo always been this strong? Not to mention big as well. One hand cuffed both of Tsukishima’s wrists as he turned on the music.

When Tsukishima still tried to struggle free, Kuroo threw a threat, even though his tone lacked the venom. “Rent’s going to be $700 if you keep resisting.”

Tsukishima was good with his math and calculations came to him like breathing. A $400 difference may seem a lot—considering his situation it was a lot—but it would be a mere dent to his finance if this was a onetime thing. He’d been financially prepared to pay about that much when seeking a new place anyways. 

So he struggled on. Irrepressible giggles escaped his lips when Kuroo abandoned his phone to grab the blonde’s waist and keep him from running away. The dancer’s hands have slipped in Tsukishima’s shirt in his desperation to hold him, and don't think for a second that Tsukishima didn't notice because he noted those strong, slender fingers that splayed sternly against his bare abdomen, nails scraping skin in the wrestling. But it was Kuroo’s velvet laugh that tugged his heart for the third time this morning.

Suddenly, the ground disappeared beneath Tsukishima, and his voice hitched before his back hit the familiar softness of the living room couch.

“You,” Kuroo wheezed, barely keeping the lollipop from falling out of his mouth after he finally pinned Tsukishima down, “are a handful.”

“Well, I never said I wasn’t,” Tsukishima managed through streams of laughter that weren’t quite done yet.

Still, it took only one glance from the man hovering over him to suspend it all. Not because Kuroo was menacing in anyway. Well, maybe menacingly charming. Tsukishima swallowed thickly as his eyes followed the sweat trail from Kuroo’s forehead down his temple, his cheeks, his angular jaws because _damn_... maybe he really shouldn’t be looking below Kuroo’s defined collarbone. His eyes traveled back up, absently counting each time Kuroo swallowed (10) until he somehow found himself staring at the collarbone again. This time, he didn’t stop the gaze from wandering down the V of Kuroo’s shirt, another black muscle shirt that knew how to hug perfect bodies. It didn’t miss a single crevice. Kuroo’s toned waist was slim, yeah, with just enough curves to be deemed dangerous. Tsukishima’s fingers tingled curiously. It was a good thing his hands were cuffed, and Kuroo wasn’t straddling him.

“Like what you see?” Tsukishima’s attention snapped back to Kuroo’s eyes, two golden pools of amusement, before his face burned up. He had been openly checking Kuroo out, lying beneath him of all things.

Tsukishima scoffed, averting his gaze before he admitted almost bitterly, “Who wouldn’t?”

Kuroo smirked, obviously delighted to hear Tsukishima’s words. “Well, if you’d just stand as I told you to…”

Tsukishima turned back to look at Kuroo, almost taking the dare of that arched eyebrow. Almost.

A whistle came from the door. “I thought prices were only paid at night,” Oikawa remarked before leaning against the kitchen counter. 

“It’s called a doorbell,” Kuroo dodged the subject and got off of Tsukishima. Nothing happened, but Tsukishima sure as hell felt like something happened. He fixed himself and greeted Oikawa with a nod, hoping his face wasn’t as red as it felt.

“You weren’t answering my calls, and for the record, your doorbell isn't working,” Oikawa retorted. “Good thing I remember where you put the spare key.”

“What do you need so early on the day after your boyfriend’s birthday party?” Kuroo questioned as he reached for his phone to turn off the music. “Shouldn’t you still be in bed or something?”

“Suga said to check up on blondie there,” Oikawa said.

Kuroo twirled the lollipop in his mouth and laughed. “Yeah right.”

Oikawa sighed. "Iwa-chan won’t make it tonight."

"Oh, he couldn't just tell me?" Kuroo looked through his phone for missed calls or texts.

"Well, he tried calling before he left but it kept going straight to your voicemail, not to mention that it is full. So I decided to come by and see if you were still alive." Oikawa’s eyebrow lifted, eyeing Tsukishima deliberately with a smirk on his face. “Seems like you are still very much alive, aren’t you Kuroo-chan?”

Kuroo rolled his eyes, taking the lollipop stick out of his mouth. “Breakfast’s on the table,” Kuroo said to Tsukishima before gesturing Oikawa to his room.

The door remained shut for 15 minutes with no sound. If Tsukishima hadn’t seen how head over hills Oikawa was for Sugawara, he’d think those two were doing something else. 

“I get what you’re saying, but it’s a pretty big opportunity,” Kuroo said when the door opened.

“I know you’re talented, but you need to turn it down.” Oikawa’s voice was stern, but Tsukishima could make out the regret laced with the demand. “I need an answer.”

There was a long silence before Kuroo let out a heavy sigh. “Ok.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you, but I don’t trust you,” Oikawa said candidly. “With what happened last time, I have to see the text.”

“Don’t worry…” Kuroo said lowly. “I know better.”

The discussion went on for another five minutes before Oikawa popped his head in the kitchen to bid Tsukishima goodbye.

“What’s happening tonight?” Tsukishima asked when Kuroo came and sat in front of him. His eyes were on the table, and his hair was no longer tied up as the unruly strands hid most of his face.

“Nothing anymore,” Kuroo sighed, raking his fingers through his hair before looking at Tsukishima. His expression was soft, eyes languid and half a smile as he rested his cheek against his forearm.

Tsukishima could tell he didn't want to trouble him. He glanced down to pick at his food, searching for words. “What was supposed to happen?”

“Just clubbing,” Kuroo said lightly and stood from the chair to stretch before heading to the living room to throw himself on the couch. “Is it too early to be drinking?”

“Obviously.” It was probably 8 something, but Tsukishima couldn’t be sure since he left his phone in the bedroom.

Kuroo heaved another sigh, swinging his legs off the arm of the couch. “Tsukishima…” he groaned, the new low of his voice made Tsukishima’s hair stand. “What’s a good substitute for drinking?”

“I usually eat sweets,” Tsukishima suggested. “Eat some ice cream?”

“It’s too early to drink but not eat sweets?” Kuroo laughed dryly, the challenge clear in his tone. “Yeah, that makes _perfect_ sense.”

Tsukishima’s eyebrow lifted and he walked over to the couch. “What?”

“I said give me some ice cream from the freezer,” Kuroo said, the mischievous grin tugging at his lips as he covered his eyes.

“That’s what I thought,” Tsukishima retorted before he went to grab one of the pint of ice cream from the freezer.

Tsukishima placed the ice cream container on the coffee table and sat down in the corner of the couch before handing the spoon to Kuroo. “Here.”

Kuroo rolled on his stomach and took it obligingly. He scooped a spoonful of vanilla ice cream from the container. However, instead of eating it, he offered it to Tsukishima.

“I’m not the one who wanted it.”

“Aw, come on. I’m trying feed you,” Kuroo said, propping himself up on his elbows.

Tsukishima eyed him suspiciously. “All the more reason not to.”

Kuroo frowned but ate the ice cream. One. Two. Three. Four bites. Kuroo glanced up to Tsukishima and licked the spoon. The way his tongue circled the spoon, Tsukishima knew he meant it to be intentional. He smacked Kuroo’s head lightly, a gesture he seemed to have subconsciously mirrored from Iwaizumi last night.

“You done?”

“Never,” Kuroo purred and licked the spoon again.

“Ew, don’t use that spoon again,” Tsukishima laughed, taking the ice cream container away before the spoon touched it.

Kuroo’s lips curved mischievously but he didn’t say anything. He slid closer to Tsukishima and rubbed his head against Tsukishima’s thigh. The action made Tsukishima’s heart stutter, but he didn’t push the older man off. Instead, he placed the ice cream container back on the coffee table and ran his fingers through Kuroo’s soft hair.

“Sorry you can’t go clubbing,” Tsukishima said softly, realizing that all Kuroo probably wanted was contact, skin contact, but didn’t really know how to ask for it. Couldn’t really ask for it. “I’ll drink with you tonight.”

“It’s ok.” Kuroo rolled on his back, not really looking at Tsukishima but the ceiling. He wasn’t smiling, but he wasn’t mad. Maybe a little sad, but he was just himself. ‘’This is fine.”

Tsukishima continued stroking Kuroo’s head until the latter fell asleep. Though his face was soft unguarded, it didn’t lack the stunning charm and beauty. If Tsukishima were to think about it, Yamaguchi had a cute, childlike innocence when he slept, which greatly contrasted with how he was when wasted—untamed and fierce. It took until junior year in high school before Yamaguchi borrowed Tsukishima’s shoulder to sleep on, having never really dared to touch his lap. He wouldn’t be able to relax with Yamaguchi resting on him like this endearing stranger though. Tsukishima wondered how he was able to be at ease watching Kuroo sleep. The soundless breath made a steady count. He lost to sleep after 50 breaths. 

 

Tsukishima opened his eyes when he heard an unfamiliar ringtone.

“Hey,” Kuroo greeted, still resting his head quite snugly on Tsukishima’s thigh. “You were drooling.”

“I was not.” Tsukishima wiped his mouth anyways. “What time is it?”

“1:14.” Kuroo turned to his side. “You got places to go?”

Tsukishima rubbed his eyes sluggishly as he thought about it. School and work didn’t start until next week. He didn’t make any plans with anyone. It was Sunday. “No…”

“Let’s go watch a movie…” Kuroo suggested. “Or climb a rock.”

Tsukishima tried not to groan about either. He would rather just curl up in bed and listen to music all day.

“Or go to the beach, or--” Kuroo continued before the ringtone that woke Tsukishima up sounded again.

“Are you going to answer that?”

It was Kuroo’s turn to groan, but Tsukishima’s questioning eyes made him answer the call.

“What?” Kuroo said tersely before changing his tone. “Bokuto? Why are you calling from Oikawa’s phone?” He sat up and glanced quickly at Tsukishima before continuing conversation with Bokuto. “Wait, let me ask…” Kuroo turned to Tsukishima, “Tsukki—shima, wanna go eat barbecue?”

That was a better option than movies and hiking. “Sure.”

“After hiking at the beach and we can go watch movies later,” Kuroo added with a wink and hung up before Tsukishima had time to protest. Though that didn’t exactly stop Tsukishima from gripping his shoulders and glaring at him. “I was kidding. Everyone’s exhausted and Bokuto and Akaashi work at 4 anyways.”

“If we end up hiking, I’m going to personally kill you,” Tsukishima threatened before releasing Kuroo and walking back to his room.

“We’re leaving in 10 minutes,” Kuroo called from the kitchen.

Tsukishima had 2 missed calls from Sugawara and several texts from Yamaguchi telling him that he had headed back home and wouldn’t be back until next month. He returned Sugawara’s call to find out that he was calling because they couldn’t get in touch with Kuroo. Now they were all heading over to the restaurant for barbecue.

Kuroo had changed into red joggers and a loose fitting black tee with a neckline that sat low on his chest. Tsukishima’s eyes subconsciously fell on the neckline before Kuroo zipped up his light jacket.

“You look like you’re going jog--” Tsukishima stopped himself and frowned. “Are we really going hiking?”

Kuroo looked at Tsukishima, completely confused before he started laughing uncontrollably.

“Just wearing comfortably,” Kuroo explained. “Not going hiking.”

The ride to the restaurant was a torturing 15 minutes as Kuroo laughed the whole time, trying to describe the look on Tsukishima’s face. Even when he stopped, the stupid grin never left his face, probably replaying the scene over and over again in his head.

When Tsukishima finally escaped the car, he spotted Sugawara and Akaashi waiting outside the restaurant while Bokuto and Oikawa had gone inside to check in. Sugawara quickly waved to Tsukishima before going toward the car to talk to Kuroo.

“Hey, slept well?” Akaashi greeted when Tsukishima got to him.

“Yeah,” Tsukishima responded before they both focused their attention to Sugawara and Kuroo.

“He’s probably apologizing about the event tonight,” Akaashi explained. 

“Clubbing?” Tsukishima asked, remembering Kuroo’s response. 

“VIP Clubbing.” 

Tsukishima turned to look at the older man. “Why can’t he go?”

“He doesn’t have a partner,” Akaashi said lightly before returning Tsukishima’s gaze. “Do you dance Tsukishima?”

“No,” he responded timidly when he felt Akaashi’s eyes raking over him. He’d spoken with Akaashi before, but never alone. Akaashi’s unreadable expression was discomforting though he knew the older man meant no harm.

“That’s too bad.”

“Yeah,” Tsukishima managed as Akaashi’s gaze now lingered on his arms.

“Do you work out?” Akaashi tilted his head to the side in observation and thought. “How much do you bench?”

“I bench 300, babe,” Bokuto crooned as he slid his arm down Akaashi’s back. “Isn’t that enough?”

Akaashi smirked before the blue in his eyes darkened in amusement, putting Tsukishima on edge. “I’m just seeing if he’ll be able to handle Kuroo.” His head tipped back a little as Bokuto slid a kiss from the base of his neck to the corner of his jaw. “You’ll be fine, Tsukishima.” A single touch of Akaashi’s hand on Bokuto’s chest was enough the stop him from kissing. Bokuto left to Kuroo and Akaashi’s expression softened. “Let’s go join the others.”

Tsukishima would be lying if he said he didn’t feel out of place sitting there, barbequing with the group. But everyone was so kind, being so mindful of their conversations so he’d be able to engage. They were absolutely generous with the steak, placing honestly too much on his plate he couldn’t possibly finish.

“You don’t work until next week right?” Sugawara verified. “We’re going to Stray Hearts afterwards. You should come too.”

Tsukishima glanced at Kuroo, who was in a deep conversation with Oikawa at this point, before responding. “Depends if he goes.”

“He’s going,” Bokuto entered the conversation, Sugawara nodding on the side.

“He needs a substitute for clubbing,” Akaashi explained. “That or hiking.”

The comment got Tsukishima laughing. That was Kuroo’s stress relief. He now questioned if Akaashi’s words about him were right at all? Would Tsukishima be able to handle Kuroo? Would he really be fine?

When they got to the bar, Bokuto and Akaashi went to change in uniforms while Tsukishima and the rest took seats are the counter, drunk off of the atmosphere before the alcohol even entered their bodies. Tsukishima only took one shot with them when Bokuto and Akaashi came back to the counter. The three older men took several shots together before disappearing into the dance floor after failing to invite Tsukishima to join them.

“You don’t need to be so tense,” Akaashi said and handed Tsukishima a glass of light beer. “Everyone’s just out to have fun. You should enjoy yourself too.”

“Thanks.” Tsukishima took a few sips of the drink before letting his eyes wander the bar. It was only 4:30, but the bar was decently filled. There were probably about 15 people dancing on the dance floor. He had seen Oikawa and Sugawara dancing up until 5 minutes ago, but now they were nowhere in sight. He took another drink from his cup and spotted the red joggers and black tee. Kuroo had abandoned his jacket somewhere and lost himself in the crowd. Tsukishima’s eyes lingered on him.

Something about the way Kuroo danced drugged Tsukishima into a high and he wondered if he should be watching him at all. Tsukishima had gone to drinking parties and bars often with Yamaguchi and had been visually exposed to various types of dancing, but the way Kuroo’s body pressed up against the faceless bodies around him choked the air in Tsukishima’s lungs. He began wondering what he’d been doing at those events besides watching Yamaguchi roam aimlessly around, dancing a different kind of dance than Kuroo, and getting drunk. Tsukishima’s thought process stalled. He’d never had a physical reaction from watching anyone dance, but the way Kuroo's hips rolled into the dips of the body in front of him with each beat made Tsukishima’s stomach clench.

“Maybe it’s too late of a warning, but keep your eyes off of that guy,” Akaashi warned when he replaced Tsukishima’s empty cup with a shot. “He’s like a fucking siren when he dances.”

Tsukishima didn’t say anything. It really was a warning too late because here he was, barely sipping his glass of whatever Akaashi gave him, but completely drunk off of Kuroo and the perfect curve of his back whenever he thrust his chest forward and pulled his shoulders back to brush himself against another body. Tsukishima’s heart stuttered at the all too enhanced display of Kuroo’s body structure, and he gulped down the glass, trying to focus on the bitterness of the drink, which wasn’t particularly strong. He was used to taking shots that dragged fire down his throat and set his heart ablaze until he couldn’t feel anymore. Being with Yamaguchi started pushing him toward that option. He didn’t drink to socialize but to drown. In tears. In memories of those forbidden moments between Yamaguchi and him. He drank to conjure the touches, the sensation that existed in those moments alone.

Actually, Tsukishima wasn’t particularly socializing now either. Kuroo was dancing with himself, for himself. Every now and then, he had gestured Tsukishima over, speaking air to him as his untamed hair clung to his skin like wet brushes. Of course Tsukishima had declined. He didn’t dance, and just the thought of having Kuroo’s body against him was enough to wake goosebumps across Tsukishima's skin and make his hair stand.

Tsukishima’s eyes found Kuroo on the dance floor again and he almost immediately regretted having emptied the glass of alcohol. He swallowed thickly when Kuroo's mouth opened, a gasp nearly audible before he slid his tongue across his teeth and his lashes fluttered open. A new body had found its way behind Kuroo and grabbed his waist.

“Fucking Iwa, I swear.” Bokuto’s voice was low behind the counter, but the amusement was clear in his words. Tsukishima had been so caught up with Kuroo, he didn’t realize that the one person who’d been daring enough to touch Kuroo was Iwaizumi. He was sporting a loose tank top that flaunted his sturdy and defined muscles, and his ripped jeans fitted nicely around thick, muscular thighs.

“Guess he was able to make it,” Akaashi noted. “He’ll probably try to get Kuroo for yesterday,” he observed before Tsukishima’s attention zeroed in on Iwaizumi’s hand that was now gliding down Kuroo’s hip toward his inner thigh.

Tsukishima was completely entranced when he caught Kuroo’s whiskey gaze, so intoxicatingly seductive as he lowered hips to rest on Iwaizumi's, arms fisted out in front of him. A pool of heat formed in Tsukishima’s stomach and rushed up to his face when Kuroo ran his hands to his knees and spread his legs abruptly with a beat Tsukishima wasn’t ready for. He could feel goosebumps prickling throughout his body but couldn’t turn away, not with Kuroo’s eyes locked onto his like this. Tsukishima inhaled the little air that was left around him when the dancer’s hips grinded deep into Iwaizumi's pelvis, the circular motions and Kuroo's hot gaze making Tsukishima's body react as though he'd been the one dancing. He shivered visibly, wondering what position Kuroo took in bed when Iwaizumi forced his hips upwards. Kuroo reveled in both men’s the responses, running his hands down his chest as his lips curled into a smirk that Tsukishima knew all too well. The dancer's hands didn’t make it very far before his lashes swept down and his eyes rolled shut. Kuroo tipped his head back and threw his arms up to rake those slender fingers through his Iwaizumi’s hair. The bliss on Kuroo’s face when he bit his lower lip as Iwaizumi’s hands boldly lifted his shirt to reveal his abdomen rendered Tsukishima breathless, only finding air again when Kuroo let his body drop to the floor before popping back up.

"Damn," Akaashi drawled almost bitterly, handing Tsukishima a new glass. "Kuroo and his slutdrops."

Tsukishima cleared his throat and took the shot, hoping to calm himself. "Yeah."

“How’s living with Kuroo?” Akaashi asked, changing the subject to drag Tsukishima’s attention away from the dance floor. Maybe he was trying to save Tsukishima from being completely overwhelmed by Kuroo.

Tsukishima faced the bartender, not quite able to meet his eyes because the images of Akaashi and Bokuto last night decided to showcase themselves in his mind now. “Ok…? He cooks, I clean.” Tsukishima shrugged. “It’s only been a week.”

“I see. You think you’re going to start dancing?” Akaashi’s hands were diligently working without him looking away from Tsukishima once. This person had amazing concentration.

Tsukishima tilted his head slightly, his attention profoundly focused on counting how many drinks Akaashi was working on. “Can’t say…”

“That’s probably a yes,” Akaashi said, drawing Tsukishima’s attention back to him and handing him a cup of water.

“Probably," Tsukishima agreed. “Is it normal to want to dance while watching him?”

Akaashi invited with a grin, “Maybe come back again Friday and find out for yourself.”

Tsukishima chuckled, nearly finishing the cup of water while Akaashi served a couple. Guess he was more thirsty than he thought.

“Does this happen every Friday?”

“Most Fridays.”

Tsukishima finished his cup, cooling himself down. He wasn’t drunk, but knew he was intoxicated enough for Akaashi to comfortably answer questions. “Why?”

“Because this is how they scout for students,” Akaashi nodded his head toward Kuroo and Iwaizumi, who were now the center of attention on the dance floor. "And clients."

“Iwaizumi’s an instructor too?”

Akaashi shook his head. “Not anymore, and not in the same way as Kuroo.”

Tsukishima’s eyebrows quirked. “What do you mean?”

“While Kuroo does instruct at dance studios in groups like Iwaizumi, specializing in pairs or individuals, his focus has been choreographic commissions.”

“Ok…so why doesn’t he go elsewhere to advertise?”

“He did,” Akaashi stated matter-of-factly. “He got drugged. Twice.”

The sentence sent chills up Tsukishima’s spine and he nearly choked. What kind of places had he gone to?

Akaashi handed Tsukishima a new cup of water and added, "His charm rakes in all sorts of people. The more high end the place, the more dangerous and vicious types."

"Talking about me?" Kuroo asked and casually wrapped his arms around Tsukishima's shoulders.

"Yeah,” Akaashi answered nonchalantly. “Are you paying for all of Tsukishima's drinks? He's drank plenty."

"Aww, Tsukki, you're supposed to be the D.D.," Kuroo whined, playfully shaking Tsukishima until he turned to face the older man. Kuroo's face glistened in sweat, his eyes slightly red, but Tsukishima could still make out the flirt.

"It was just 4 shots." That was probably a lie. Tsukishima couldn’t remember how many he took. He had been too focused on Kuroo as he consumed the drinks.

The man grinned and inched closer. "Was it just 4?"

Tsukishima tried to not fluster at the lack of space between them. "I'm not drunk."

"Good, because I am," Kuroo announced before letting go of Tsukishima. He jabbed his thumb toward the table of people who were chatting with Iwaizumi. "And, well, I might be pretty wasted by the time we're done over there."

It wasn’t long after Kuroo left that Tsukishima chanced upon Akaashi’s face turning pale. Akaashi’s eyes widened, his lips twitched just enough to be noticed. There weren’t many things that can cause Akaashi’s expression to change. Within a moment’s notice, Akaashi was next to Bokuto, his hand strangling his boyfriend’s wrist, the action itself putting Bokuto on guard before his eyes narrowed in on a green haired girl by the door. Tsukishima watched his mouth move in silence, a feat he didn’t think was possible with Bokuto. 

Akaashi was back in front of Tsukishima before he had time to process anything. "In 5 minutes, Tsukishima. Prepare to leave in 5 minutes.”

Tsukishima opened his mouth to ask questions but Bokuto announced body shots for Oikawa and Sugawara, grabbing the attention of most drinkers in the bar.

“If you can't carry Kuroo, Iwaizumi can do that. But if Iwaizumi gets stuck, you have to make sure Kuroo gets out of Stray Hearts," Akaashi urged.

All Tsukishima could hear was his own heart pounding as he pushed himself through the crowd toward Kuroo and Iwaizumi. There were still several people, mainly girls, at the table. Two girls occupied Iwaizumi while one girl with platinum layers in a halter top had her hands on Kuroo’s chest and thigh, leaning over to reveal too much of her cleavage, though it didn’t seem like Kuroo minded. Tsukishima scrunched up his nose. It had been 2 minutes.

“Kuroo, we’re going home,” Tsukishima said sternly when he reached the table, drawing all the attention to him.

“Tsukki!” Kuroo’s voice was filled with enthusiasm as he struggled to get up from the chair. The girl didn’t give way though. She held him down, sweet talking him to stay. Tsukishima rolled his eyes, not really understanding why he was so irritated. He wondered if it would be too rough of him to shove the girl off and drag Kuroo out. 3 minutes.

“Come on, babe,” Tsukishima tried not to gag at how cheesy that sounded coming from his mouth. “Who’s gonna dance in bed with me tonight?” _Shit. Why bed?_

Kuroo’s eyebrow lifted, his cheeks flushed red before the amusement became way too obvious on his face. Tsukishima felt his ears burn. He wasn’t that drunk, neither of them was. Kuroo caressed the girl’s face and smoothly relocated her off of him. He got up, waved casually to everyone at the table before coming to stand right in front of Tsukishima with that lopsided grin. Tsukishima couldn’t look at him as he felt his whole body flush in embarrassment. 4 minutes 36 seconds…probably. It didn’t matter. He just wished he’d disappear.

“Don’t worry, babe. I will,” Kuroo teased, grabbing Tsukishima’s hand and following him as he tried to escape the scene outside.

Tsukishima let out an embarrassed groam when they got outside, wrestling free of Kuroo’s hands to cover his face. When he thought he gathered himself enough to speak, he turned to face the still grinning Kuroo, managing to only utter “Akaashi said” before he threw a fist to the dancer’s chest and turned away to once again drown in embarrassment.

“What’d Akaashi say?” Kuroo asked without hiding the laughter.

“That I needed to get you out of there in 5 minutes.”

Kuroo rubbed his hand on Tsukishima’s back thoughtfully. “Come on, let’s go home.” When Tsukishima didn’t budge, Kuroo added, “I thought you’re drinking with me tonight.”

Tsukishima drove home after determining that Kuroo had drunken too much to drive. Akaashi called to follow up if they left. What Tsukishima had thought was a joke to mess with him was actually pretty serious. The green haired girl lost a choreography competition to Kuroo last year and had since then sporadically made her appearance at places Kuroo would be going. She’d drugged Kuroo twice, and had him beaten up once.

“It’s like it’s not even real…” Tsukishima said when they got home. Maybe no one wanted to believe it was real. That’s how they could still go out and drink and dance like none of it actually happened.

Kuroo didn’t say anything. He poured Tsukishima a drink, dimmed the lights and turned on some music.

After a long silence, Tsukishima said softly, “If you can’t go out and dance, I’ll be a body for you.”

Kuroo chuckled lightly before catching Tsukishima’s eyes. “Don’t word it so strangely.”

The dim light in the room reminded Tsukishima of his nights with Yamaguchi. Essentially, he was a body for Yamaguchi as well. He loved him and in those drunken moments, he’d given his body to him. A bitter grin pulled at his lips. _It’s like it’s not even real._ How was he still able to go out and drink and let it happen again? Maybe he wanted to believe it was real. Maybe Yamaguchi wanted to believe it wasn’t.

“Hey, Tsukki--shima,” Kuroo whispered.

“Kei,” Tsukishima asserted.

“What?”

Tsukishima looked straight at Kuroo. “Call me Kei.”

“Kei,” Kuroo said hesitantly before offering his hand to Tsukishima.

Tsukishima couldn’t blame the alcohol when he took Kuroo’s hand. Because even sober he would have allowed his heart to give in to those whiskey eyes. The music that played softly now filled the room as Kuroo danced in front of him. Each move tugged at Tsukishima’s body until the gap disappeared between their bodies, and his heart pounded until it synced with the music.

“Mm,” Kuroo welcomed the contact with a hum and Tsukishima’s thoughts melted. 

Kuroo’s hands cascaded down Tsukishima's rib cage to his waist, his hips grinding playfully behind him. Honestly, Tsukishima couldn’t remember how they got in that position, but he wasn’t particularly uncomfortable. The alcohol and too many thoughts made it hard to stop his body from moving with Kuroo’s. The music was loud enough to drown in, but didn’t keep out any of Kuroo’s remarks or chuckles. Tsukishima turned to face him, took in that lopsided grin. They were home.

Without moving, both their breath suspended with the music and Kuroo’s hands glide across Tsukishima's lower back. The older man’s skin was shining slightly from sweat when Tsukishima looked at him, and the curve of his grin grew wider. Tsukishima’s hands found Kuroo’s waist before he could stop them. Slender and dangerous like he thought. Kuroo’s eyebrow quirked as Tsukishima’s hand wandered down his stomach, and he grabbed his hands before they reached below his waistband.

Tsukishima snapped out of his daze and stepped back. “Sorry.”

“It’s late. You should go shower,” Kuroo suggested, running his hand through his hair. Even with the lights dimmed, Tsukishima could make out the red flush on Kuroo's cheeks.

“Yeah, I should.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really enjoyed writing this chapter...because I got to put in a bunch of KuroTsuki in it. Sorry I'm going day to day right now, but next chapter will start time skipping. Plot also starts picking...whatever the plot is. Hope you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I really just want someone to draw them dancing.
> 
> That's it for now. Who knows whenever next chapter is coming out. But even if I don't get to it, I will be writing something for Bokuto's birthday 9/20 and Tsukki's birthday 9/27.


	6. Company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sex with alien to foreshadow invasion of land. What about you?”
> 
> This time Kuroo actually turned to face Tsukishima. “Wow, Kei. I didn’t realize you were into that kind of stuff.”
> 
> Tsukishima smacked Kuroo’s shoulder again. “You dodged the question.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 30 mins before June 1st ends and I'm alive! The chapter ended up being shorter because if I start the other part, it would become really long so here's just my KuroTsuki bbys enjoying each other's company.
> 
> A few quick announcements. If you follow my tumblr (or twitter), you'll know that I'm back for another year of Hearty KuroTsuki Festival Week from July 1 - July 11 2018. Prompts are at the end notes for those interested in joining.
> 
> I'm also participating in the Twelve OiSuga Zine, so if you're one of my OiSuga readers as well, the zine is up for preorders on June 13th. For more information, please go to the Twelve Oisuga Zine tumblr.

\-----Friday, June 23-----

It had been 5 days since Tsukishima danced with Kuroo, and his body still tingled just looking at him. But that was it. Besides having meals together, Kuroo had been deeply engrossed in his choreography. Every morning so far, he spent dancing until he head out to the studio for classes. Kuroo taught two different level classes at the studio Mondays through Thursdays before private lessons for individuals or pairs afterwards, generally working from 10:00 a.m. – 6:00 p.m. Last night was the same as last Thursday. Kuroo went out drinking and didn’t come home until after midnight.

Kuroo was lying on the living floor with one arm on his forehead when Tsukishima got to the kitchen. His graphic tee was drenched in sweat and his joggers were pulled up to his knees. Tsukishima grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and placed it in his hand.

“Thanks,” Kuroo said weakly without opening his eyes.

“I’m heading out.” Tsukishima brushed Kuroo’s hair out of his face, feeling the sweat cling to his skin, as he waited for a response from the older man.

“Stray Hearts.” Kuroo placed a hand on Tsukishima’s and opened his eyes. ” You coming tonight?”

Tsukishima nodded and got up, pulling his hand away from Kuroo’s. “Akaashi asked me to.”

Kuroo smiled. “I’m leaving at 7. You’ll be back by then?”

Another nod and Tsukishima headed out.

Tsukishima had also been keeping busy these past 5 days with his own studies. On Math. On Literature. On cooking.

“Welcome to---Tsukishima? What are you doing here?” Tsukishima forgot that Hinata also worked at the gym.

“What else can I do at a gym?”

Hinata frowned and swiped Tsukishima’s Student ID. This gym was usually empty around this time, between 1:00 p.m. – 4:00 p.m., studios included. Tsukishima threw his bag to the floor, closed the blinds and stood in front of the mirror. It was 2:30 p.m. Tsukishima had an hour and a half.

Tsukishima had thought that Kuroo would use him to dance more, but he didn’t. It wasn’t like he hoped for it or was bothered much by it. Well, it shouldn’t have bothered him at all. But it bothered him. Unnecessarily. To the point he was willing to drag himself here to dance. And Tsukishima didn’t dance. He placed his hands on his waist and sighed. Was it going to be another day that he couldn’t bring himself to do it?

Tsukishima closed his eyes. How did Kuroo do it? Where was Kuroo on him that made his body respond? Where were his hands? Where were his hips? The questions drew out the tantalizing images of Kuroo dancing at the bar. Lured out the sensation of Kuroo’s touches on Tsukishima at home. His body began to move with the memory.

Tsukishima opened his eyes when he felt that his body relaxed enough to dance consciously, only to have his whole body freeze completely. Someone was leaning next to the studio door, watching him.

“Go on, don’t mind me.” The man was tall, much taller than Tsukishima, with silver hair.

“How long have you been there?” Tsukishima tried to keep his voice calm, but he was starting to feel the heat burn his ears and face. He didn’t even hear the man come in.

The man pushed himself off the wall and walked toward Tsukishima. Now that he was closer, Tsukishima could make out the green of his catlike eyes. His lips curved into a grin. “When you were stiff.”

Tsukishima blushed, the embarrassment penetrating him. He couldn’t say anything back, but he didn’t look away either, getting the man’s grin to broaden.

“I’ll show you something.” The man took a few steps away from Tsukishima and planted his feet shoulder width apart, inviting Tsukishima to mirror him with a nod. Tsukishima did.

“They’re basic stretches…” Tsukishima said as they traveled the studio with walking lunges.

“Yup.” The man chirped enthusiastically. “It’s to loosen up your hips.” He turned a corner. “One of my friends had me do this when I first learned to dance.”

Tsukishima’s breathing was starting to shorten. He needed to work more on his endurance. He observed the movement of the man’s legs. “How long are we doing this?”

“Just one more round.” He slowed down the pace. “My friend had me do 5 rounds. I think he just had me do it for his own entertainment though.” He frowned a bit. “But he’s a really good dancer so I didn’t mind. You should see him dance some day.” He mumbled on. “I haven’t seen him in a while. Maybe I should go visit.”

They came to a stop where they first started the lunges, Tsukishima breathing harder than usual. Maybe it was because he kept trying to reach the same stride length as the silver haired man. Tsukishima walked over to grab his bag, pulling out the water to quench his thirst.

“Are you leaving already?” The man asked, getting only a nod out of Tsukishima. It was already a little over an hour. He didn’t want to encounter the incoming rush of people on his way out.

\-----  
Kuroo was asleep on the couch when Tsukishima got home. He had changed out of his clothes to a loose tank top and long shorts. Tsukishima fixed his shirt so that the pink bud on his chest wasn’t showing, unintentionally waking him up.

“Kei, welcome back.” Kuroo sat up rubbing his eye. “There’s food on the table if you haven’t eaten yet.”

“I’m gonna shower first.” Tsukishima went back to his room to get his towel, responding to Yamaguchi’s texts before hitting the showers.

Kuroo looked exhausted when Tsukishima got to the kitchen. He was still sitting up, resting his head on the cushion with one arm hanging off the couch. His hair was messier than usual, eyes droopier than usual.

“You look terrible.”

Kuroo laughed lightly. He probably didn’t have enough energy to respond.

“You sure you wanna go tonight?”

“We still have a few hours,” Kuroo yawned. “I’ll be fine after a small nap.”

Tsukishima watched Kuroo lay back down on the couch and proceeded into the kitchen to eat the curry Kuroo made.

“Kei, can you bring me a bottle of water?” Kuroo called from the living room when Tsukishima finished washing the dishes.

Kuroo was sitting up again when Tsukishima got to the couch, making room for him to sit. Tsukishima handed the older man the bottle and took a seat next to him. “So, how far did you get?”

“I got most of the single parts done,” Kuroo gulped down the whole bottle and grinned. “Wanna see?”

Tsukishima thought about it, scrunching his eyebrows a bit before responding. “Yeah.”

Kuroo turned on the speakers and connected his phone. The soft rhythm of the song and Kuroo’s movements lulled Tsukishima into a trance. Kuroo didn’t have the same intoxicating seduction as he did that night at the bar. His movements and expressions were more chaste, smooth and delicate. Each move was gingerly approached, almost as though to only whisper hidden emotions, falling in sync with the mellowness of the song and its focus on a fleeting moment of the possibilities of a new love.

“This part, I’ll need you,” Kuroo extended his hand toward Tsukishima. In that moment, Tsukishima could feel a little rush pooling into his heart.

“For?”

Kuroo shrugged, the Cheshire cat smile on his face giving it away. Tsukishima took the hand because he wanted to confirm something and, well, he wanted to dance with Kuroo. The smile that lit up on Kuroo’s face made Tsukishima’s heart squirm. He couldn’t be sure if he could get used to it.

“First,” Kuroo grabbed Tsukishima’s waist, suddenly pulling him closely. “Capture the tension.”

Tsukishima felt like the air around them were suspended as they stood forehead to forehead, almost afraid to breathe. If Tsukishima’s hands weren’t between their chests, Kuroo would have been able to hear the loud hammering of his heart. And yet, his hands being there was also the problem. Tsukishima’s face burned up. His opened palms were on Kuroo’s chest, fingers slid between the straps of his tanktop to rest on the smooth buds. “Tension?” Tsukishima asked, trying to remain calm and also to decide whether it would be more obvious if he moved his hands from Kuroo’s nipples or not.

Kuroo tipped his head back a little and laughed. “Yeah.” He moved his hands up Tsukishima’s back, feeling the muscle tense up before stepping back. “Then withdrawal.” Tsukishima felt the air weigh down on him enough for a quick breath before it disappeared again when Kuroo stepped toward Tsukishima to grab his waist again. He gave Tsukishima a quick spin, turning the him around to hug him from behind. “Then desire.” Tsukishima’s heart stopped pumping when Kuroo trailed the tip of his nose down his nape, his hands sliding from Tsukishima’s waist down the front of his thighs. “And withdrawal again.”

The song was still playing, but all Tsukishima could hear was his blood rushing and heart pounding because Kuroo’s hands were gripping too close to his inner thigh. His hands were supposed to withdraw and he was supposed to step back, but instead Kuroo’s lips touched Tsukishima’s neck.

“Um…” Tsukishima started, trying to pull away. “Kuroo?”

Tsukishima hadn’t noticed that Kuroo’s hands were no longer on him. Kuroo had passed out and Tsukishima was somehow quick enough the catch the man before he collapsed on the living floor. He dragged Kuroo to the couch, panicking at the sudden turn of events as he shuffled around for blankets and water, all the while calling Akaashi to tell him of the situation.

“Is he still breathing?” Akaashi asked on the other line.

“Yes, he’s still breathing.”

“Then he’s fine. Just overworked.”

After giving a few instructions on how to care for Kuroo, Akaashi hung up. Tsukishima brought a chair over to sit next to the couch. Kuroo’s body temperature was normal when Tsukishima brushed his hair away from his face. It was soothing to watch him sleep. Tsukishima wondered if anyone else had watched Kuroo sleep, because he knew that Yachi now watched Yamaguchi sleep, probably counting the constellations on his cheeks like Tsukishima used to. Counting, maybe kissing. Tsukishima never got to kiss those freckles. He touched Kuroo’s cheek, cleared of specks. There wasn’t anything to count, but he didn’t mind. He could continue to gaze at him without numbers.

“Hey,” Tsukishima greeted when Kuroo opened his eyes.

“Hey.”

Tsukishima pulled his chair closer to Kuroo. “Guess what happened?”

“You beat me up until I passed out,” Kuroo joked.

“You got the last part right.” Tsukishima handed Kuroo a bottle of water. “You feeling better? I told Akaashi-san that we’re not going tonight.”

Kuroo checked his phone. It was 8:40 p.m. “Yeah, I probably shouldn’t.” He glanced at the T.V. “What are you watching?”

“Not exactly sure,” Tsukishima shrugged. “It just started about 10 minutes ago.”

Somehow, between that moment and half an hour later, Tsukishima made it to the couch.

“If you’re scared, just stop watching,” Kuroo teased.

“You’re the one who’s scared,” Tsukishima bit back. He could handle horror movies. It was the aftermath that he didn’t take so well. “Besides, I need to know what’ll happen next.”

Kuroo moved a bit closer to Tsukishima. “They’ll all die.”

“Of course they all die. That’s the general route most horrors take. You’re not supposed to bother vengeful demons, curses, and so on.” Tsukishima mumbled. His voice was barely audible as the camera angle of the scene put him on edge. There was going to be a jump scare.

Except there wasn’t. He hated when that happened with movies. It really put him on edge.

“Boo!”

Tsukishima’s heart jumped, though fortunately he didn’t scream. He turned around to hit Kuroo’s shoulder. “Let the movie do its job.”

Tsukishima’s face was probably red as Kuroo stifled down a laugh before turning his attention back to the movie. They continued watching in silence until the inevitable, god-awful scene came.

Tsukishima was fine watching sex scenes in movies by himself, but it was always a bit awkward watching it with someone else. It didn’t help that the foreplay was reminding him of his dance with Kuroo earlier. His skin tingled where Kuroo’s hands were.

As though Kuroo could sense the awkwardness, he suddenly asked, “Why do you think they put sex scenes in movies?”

“Supposedly, it depends from genre to genre. Some are to establish a relationship, some are to provide tension, and then some are metaphors with an underlying message, like say a sex scene in a movie during the colonial period. The male penetration of a female would represent the invasion of land, or loss of power.” When the sex scene on screen went longer than anticipated, Tsukishima added, “In horror, thriller, and suspense, a moment like this captures vulnerability, human weakness (or stupidity) of giving in to a fleeting moment of lust to give the antagonist an upper hand.” At this point, Tsukishima was just over the scene. “But honestly, I think directors just want sex scenes in the movies.”

Kuroo laughed. “Well, here comes the ghost taking advantage of the moment.”

“I knew it would happen.”

“If you were a director, would you put a sex scene in your movie?” Kuroo asked without peeling his eyes away from the screen.

“Depends on what I’m directing,” Tsukishima responded, trying to dodge the topic.

But Kuroo didn’t back down. “Romance.”

“You watch romance?”

“Just throwing it out there.”

Tsukishima chuckled, “No, I wouldn’t. Drama, maybe, but not romance.”

“Sci-Fi?”

“Sex with alien to foreshadow invasion of land. What about you?”

This time Kuroo actually turned to face Tsukishima. “Wow, Kei. I didn’t realize you were into that kind of stuff.”

Tsukishima smacked Kuroo’s shoulder again. “You dodged the question.”

Kuroo grinned and turned his attention back to the movie. “What genre?”

“Dance.”

There was a long silence as the girl on screen started slowly walking through the hallway of the house. Another camera angle Tsukishima wasn’t comfortable with.

“Shit!” Kuroo blurted when the ghost appeared. “That scared me.”

“I knew it,” Tsukishima muttered to himself. His hands were clenching the blanket they shared.

The movie only lasted another 10 minutes, ending with the death of all characters. It was only 10:00 p.m. so they decided to eat a light dinner before calling it a night and going back to their rooms.

Tsukishima was texting Akaashi status on Kuroo and reading a book when there was a knock at his door.

“Yes?”

“Wanna play a board game?” Kuroo asked, showing Tsukishima the game.

Kuroo was probably restless because of the movie, but Tsukishima wasn’t exactly in the board game mood, so instead he got out of bed and walked to Kuroo. “I’ll keep you company until you fall asleep.”

Kuroo’s bed was bigger than Tsukishima’s and the mattress was softer. Tsukishima sat at the edge of the bed while Kuroo was tucked in bed, still worn out.

“Don’t be a stranger,” Kuroo said, getting Tsukishima to lie on top of the blanket next to him.

“You’re a handful,” Tsukishima mumbled.

“Makes up for low rent, doesn’t it?”

A grin tugged a Tsukishima’s mouth. “You do this to everyone?”

“Do what?”

“Invite people to bed.”

“Is that what you think?” Tsukishima couldn’t tell if Kuroo was trying to imply anything with that response because his tone was leveled, expression calm, as to neither deny nor admit to it. His eyes were languid, and Tsukishima couldn’t help but drink in the whiskey.

“I don’t know what to think, Kuroo,” Tsukishima responded softly. “I don’t really know anything about you.”

“For starters, I like dancing, cooking…and lollipops.” Kuroo shifted closer to Tsukishima, sandwiching his arm between his head and the pillow. “I drink bourbon neat, listen to anything really.” He paused to ponder a little before grinning; the mischievous glint flickered in his eyes. Even though Tsukishima had only been living with Kuroo for about a week, he already knew that look. “I also like making out and having sex.”

Tsukishima flicked his finger on Kuroo’s forehead, causing the older man to wince.

“Go to sleep before you start spilling your kinks to me as well.”

“Good night,” Kuroo closed his eyes, biting back a smile. He opened one eye after several seconds and chuckled when he met Tsukishima’s. “Are you really going to watch me sleep?”

Tsukishima’s eyebrows quirked. “So it’s fine for me to leave?” He started to get up, but Kuroo grabbed his hand.

“No, stay...” Kuroo said quickly.

“Good night.”

“One more thing,” Kuroo opened his eyes and whispered. “I like…having you around.”

Tsukishima stared at Kuroo blankly as the older man quickly closed his eyes again. Tsukishima’s cheeks were probably red from the sudden statement. He waited for Kuroo to fall asleep, counting the seconds until he himself fell asleep in the comfort of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When did I last update this series?? I felt so lost about the story and my feelings toward it that I had to take a break. I'm still a bit confused as to what I'm trying to accomplish so bear with me.
> 
> As I've mentioned, I'll be writing for Hearty KuroTsuki Fest Week so I'll be putting all other works on hold. Prompts are below for anyone interested in joining. If you have questions about joining, please contact me on twitter (heartythrills), tumblr (heartythrills/heartykurotsukiweek), or instagram (heartythrills)
> 
> Day 1 Sunday 7/1 - Lies | Lyrics | Love Letter
> 
> Day 2 Monday 7/2 - Massage | Mythology | Movies
> 
> Day 3 Tuesday 7/3 - Neighbors | Neck | Notice Me
> 
> Day 4 Wednesday 7/4 - One Bed | Occupation | Oblivion
> 
> Day 5 Thursday 7/5 - Piercings | Pining | Photography
> 
> Day 6 Friday 7/6 - Quest | Quirks | Free Prompt
> 
> Day 7 Saturday 7/7 - Ring | Roommate | Rivalry
> 
> Day 8 Sunday 7/8 - Stargazing | Soulmate | Scars
> 
> Day 9 Monday 7/9 - Trapped | Tattoos | Temptation
> 
> Day 10 Tuesday 7/10 - University | Umbrella | Uniform
> 
> Day 11 Wednesday 7/11 - Vampire | Vacation | Volleyball
> 
> Until Next Time!


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